Alexander van Terheyden Blog

I only want to Retire

2012-01-08T04:49:00.000Z

Brief History of the Markets & how everyone felt at the end of 2011 & will probably feel in 2012

Its worth watching *you need sound*!

Enjoy!

Shoreditch Radio - Progression

2011-11-20T23:58:00.001Z

For the last few months I have been recording my show on Shoreditch Radio.

Here are some of the Podcasts. Enjoy!

Alexander Van Terheyden's Cloudcasts on Mixcloud

Find My Progression Facebook page obviously on facebook and click like to stay up to date with each Show.

The Show is Broadcast every 2nd Friday at 4pm.

Nevermind The Bollocks... Here's Paul Oakenfold - 2CD Out Now!

2011-07-23T16:12:00.000+01:00

Could this be the best Club Album of 2011? So far i'm very impressed - Great Driving Album also.

Oakenfold is back to his best - The above Vid is just a brief rundown of whats on the album - go listen on Spotify or go old skool and actually buy it from a Record Shop!

Deadmau5 - HR 8938 Cephei (Full - 1080p)

2011-05-01T11:42:00.002+01:00

Without a Doubt - I have played this track more than any other track in the last 30days.
A Tune if there ever was one.

The Strokes - Under Cover Of Darkness

2011-03-06T18:58:00.001Z

The Strokes - Under the Cover of Darkness.

Are you ready for their 4th Album - I certainly am - My favourite Band from the Naughties are back and from I can tell on form. Julian Casablancas and the Gang from New York look set to Dominate 2011. The 1st Single Under the Cover of Darkness is below and as per usual an excellent Music video. Do they ever not look cool?

The New Album "Angles" is out between 19th March and the 22nd March depending on what country you happen to be living in. If you buy One Album this Month. Its going to have to be The Strokes. Available to buy in all the usual formats. Get your Cassette players ready you can't go wrong!

Jacob van Hage - Clear Blue Sky Mix 12

2011-02-28T18:14:00.001Z

Jacob van Hage consistently delivers. He will be in Miami in March for the World Music Conference. Hopefully he will be in London and where you live very soon. Good skills once again. Be sure to Check out the Previous Clear Blue Sky Mixes - all can be found on his youtube site and via the global internet.

Hard Rock Sofa & St. Brothers - Blow Up (Hook N Sling & Goodwill Remix)

2011-02-14T01:02:00.001Z

Can The SHM Team do no harm? This time a release from Axtone Records - The Record Label Controlled and Run By Axwell another 33.3% of the Swedish House Mafia. This Tune has been blowing up on Dance Floors for the last month now. Although it was released to the General Public as of today.

This is by far the best remix i've heard of the song...... yet.

Kim Fai - Era (Original Mix)

2011-02-11T11:30:00.001Z

Kim Fai Delivers with this Epic Progressive House Tune "ERA"

I love this Tune because I reminds me of the Video Games from the 1980s. Synths cracked up to the full - are we racing down a digital landscaped track with pixels for the sky? Well in my mind I am. Brought to you by Size Records - Effectively Steve Angello - 33.3% of the Swedish House Mafia. This tune will be Epic - Expect many different remixes of this tune.

Look out for my remix in the London Clubs.

Tiësto feat. Jónsi - Kaleidoscope

2011-01-03T20:08:00.000Z

It's an Old Track - But every time I hear this track I'm humbled by the Power of Tiesto. 5mins in and this track explodes.

I wonder where his Summer Residency will be this year...

Happy 2011 - Make it a good one!

2011-01-01T13:21:00.000Z

Happy 2011 - A New Year and once again like everyone else I can't believe its come around so fast once again. Just for you - here is my favorite Song of January 1st. Without Fail - I play this every year. Enjoy!

For once I have to admit London's Fireworks last night were pretty good. Anyone see them?

Wonder how much all that cost!

War - Never Again

2010-12-22T01:53:00.001Z

The Above Video combined with the Amazing Inception Remix by Bahlzack "Come Follow me" - illustrates why we should never contemplate ever going to war. A Beautiful and deep song, but Damn War is not Beautiful!!! Its Bloody as Hell and should be avoided at all costs. GOD-DAMN-IT!!!

As we approach the end of another year (2010) - we should remember never give up the pressure on our world leaders when it comes to ending all wars. Is it really ever worth it?

PEACE

Being a Dickhead's Cool

2010-11-12T21:15:00.000Z

Yes its been a while for a while - but now its gone mainstream.... and err... its very spot on... Recognise everyone here! lol!

Swanky Tunes - Across the Light (Original Mix)

2010-10-30T12:26:00.001+01:00

Is this going to be the Tune of the Autumn (Fall) / Winter!? I reckon so. This Tune is going to get dropped again and again in the clubs over the coming months (mark my words).

TRON: LEGACY - Daft Punk's "Derezzed"

2010-10-27T06:27:00.003+01:00

I'm Excited - Its my youth all over again combined with the Best Electronic Band Ever. Does it get any better? I just hope Disney don't ruin this movie!

Tron!

The Barber of Seville (Salisbury) - Kings Head Theatre - Angel

2010-10-25T07:15:00.000+01:00

Review originally posted on Totally Theatre a couple of weeks ago. Posted here for Record.

"The Problem with Grand Opera is it attracts Grand People - or at least people who may think they are ‘Grand'." This is something I heard last night prior to the performance of The Barber of Seville. And I think this is an expectation that people come to expect. Well this is where the "Opera Up Close" Production Team blow that pretence and pretentiousness out of the water.

Firstly they have decided to stage their version of the famous Italian Opera at the intimate and marvelous Kings Head Theatre - It doubles up as a wonderful Boozer for the locals of Angel day and night. You won't see black ties, pearls and royal boxes at this performance, instead they want to attract those that would happily go out to the cinema or catch a west end musical as well as the usual Opera Lovers.

Some may argue that ‘Opera Up Close' are dumbing down Opera by presenting their Operas in English - but the reality is with thoughtful and brilliant translations made fresh for the modern palette they are in fact revolutionising Opera. This in fact is "The Barber of Salisbury" set not in Seville but in the small English town a couple of hundred years ago.

Well without giving to much away for those that aren't familiar with the story - The Barber is the character "Figaro" who enjoys his life very much, after all he is the "busiest man in all Salisbury"! Figaro could almost be described as the towns Cupid, for all whom he helps out, a match made in heaven is sure to follow. So it is with Figaro's charms and know how that the Marquis of Bath sets forth to snare himself the lovely Rosina away from the wet hands of Doctor Bartleby.

Effectively this is the original Hollywood "LA Story" where like-able boy wants the girl so with the aid of his suave friend he is guided on how to win the girl from the less likable Doctor and as this journey unfolds we see the Marquis of Bath giving up his Casanova ways to be with the one true girl Rosina. Simple but when the entire performance is sung (effectively that is how an Opera works) you will find many lines sung like a chorus and others as verses - it can draw out a fairly short story, but let me tell you that this is not a bad thing. The Barber of Salisbury could be described as a joyous musical affair and yes I do say musical because it comes across like a musical rather than a high brow Opera you may or may not be usually accustomed to.

I'm not of the ability to spot whether the Operatic voices were or were not flawed on the night but I can safely say that each and everyone of the performances brought to the stage by the six actors and actresses was truly mesmerizing. None more so than the brilliant Figaro played by young ‘Richard Immergluck'. Over the performance Richard captured the essence on what it was to be the plucky entrepernial Barber of Salisbury - bringing a truly English side to this character I had not seen in all Figaro performances.

The Marquis of Bath played by Gareth Dafydd Morris on the night was mesmerising as he strutted around the stage and through the audience interacting with his fellow thespians with sheer class. And although the thought that an opera could be carried with an upright piano and acoustic guitar might be baulked at by Opera Purists who demand a fully oiled orchestra it certainly didn't spoil it for myself and the rapturous audience who all walked out of the theatre gleeful and wanting more.

If you're lucky to catch this performance at the Kings Head Theatre you're going to come away smiling and extremely invigorated, refreshed in the knowledge you have just witnessed something very special despite - rare indeed when a classic graces the stage these days. If there is any Theatrical Justice in the world of London theatre this one will sell out for its entire run - I know its sold another 2 tickets because I'm going to go back again just to take it in again one more time, on second thoughts make it 4 tickets and I'll bring the family!

Beating Berlusconi! A Play of Two Halves @ The Kings Head Theatre

2010-06-21T16:27:00.000+01:00

This Review was originally posted on Totally Theatre and is now being posted here for archive reasons.....

"The Socialism I believe in is everyone working for each other, everyone having a share in the rewards. It's the way I see football, the way I see life" - Bill Shankly (1913 - 1981). The impression I got from the Turf Love Theatrical Company one man show is without Bill Shankly's outlook on life this Football Frenzy, Socialist tall tale that centres around the Champions League 2005 Final wouldn't of been possible.

Beating Berlusconi! finally comes to The Kings Head Theatre in Angel. Having received overwhelming praise in and around Liverpool I was curious if Londoners would receive this one quite as well. Especially given there were bound to be more Chelsea and Arsenal Fans around Islington than Liverpool fans.

The starting point for Beating Berlusconi was an off the wall incident which happened to Mark Radley, a long time Red. His story of blundering into the AC Milan Director's box at the Champion's League final in Istanbul, sitting next to, and then nearly having a scrap with the Mussolini loving Italian PM is one of the many famous stories that came out of that famous night - and probably the best (according to Producer John O' Conner). His extraordinary yarn was the starting point for the play.

Writer John Graham Davis has spun Mark Radley's Champion's League Final Encounter with Silvio Berlusconi in the AC Milan ViP Box as a young 24 year old. Effectively John Graham Davis has spun the VIP tale and turned Mark Bradley into the Middle Aged late 30's Kenny Nonan played by Paul Duckworth - along with an array of characters and creations - 39 in all from Kenny's 'Scally' school-pals Moose and Minty to Berlusconi himself.

Its rare to see a one man show outside Fringe Festivals and this is a commendable effort by the comically talented Paul Duckworth. A Play of two half's that doesn't come up for air - you're left gasping as his yarn unfolds in the intimate theatre. Something similar to the funny man you meet in a pub whose stories never stop. Duckworth is in his element, narrating the whole show around the big payoff but dwelling with light-hearted ease on the elements which lead up to it. Despite the play being a stampede of pub banter and extremely light hearted there are moments when the story really grabs the audience and makes them think about the more horrific elements of Liverpool that are met along the time line of history - offering another mans perspective on the Hillsborough Disaster, Racist Riot Police from Cornwall and the passing of friends you meet on the journey of life.

The characters in Beating Berlosconi are used to brilliant cartoon effect to explore the political landscape of the Eighties and Nineties. Thatcher, the Toxteth riots of 1981 and Heseltine's Garden City project are there to provide the big headline reference points. The petty-bureaucratic nightmare of signing on and trying to exist when out of work are the reality in this tall tale. All are readily brought to life by Duckworth, with Mike Wight's well-chosen bits of football video and archive photos of Liverpool there to give extra flesh to the tale.

Liverpool Fans will get a lot out of this play, Football fans will get almost as much out of it as the Red Scousers as long as they let the Chelsea comments at the beginning slide. But those of you who aren't all that overwhelmed by World Cup and the Annual Premiership Race may walk away less satisfied. Its good but I'm not swathed by the Tribalism of a love for Liverpool and while I can see why they hate Thatcher and the Sun with a passion - I'm not convinced.

6/10 (3 Stars)

The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde

2010-06-01T08:22:00.000+01:00

The Following Review was posted on http://www.totallytheatre.com/ (however - as the play will only run for the next 2 weeks I am posting the review here for archive reasons).

Read all about it, Read all about it! A tale of Horror and a lust comes to North East London! The European Arts Company bring their adaptation of Robert Louis Stevenson's "The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde" to the wonderful Kings Head Theatre in Angel. Set in 1888 2years after the characters Jekyll and Hyde were first ingrained on read and unread minds alike we find ourselves sitting intimately in a Pub within a Pub. You see the Kings Head is one of the more worthy pubs worth walking into in the Angel Islington area but as you walk to the back of the establishment you will find an intimate and welcoming theatre. Very fitting really as the play begins you are transported back in time to East Londons Spitalfields whereby we find the landlord of the Ten Bells ready to call it a night on the drunks who are now too gone to drink anymore. Certainly a strange and refreshing setting given that I often drink in the real Ten Bells on a regular basis, infamous for the fact all of Jack the Rippers Victims supposedly frequented this Merry Establishment.

So we're in a pub within a pub and the main focus of the story takes place within another Story. And unless you have lived on another planet you will be familiar with the basic premise of the Jekyll and Hyde - A story about a man who is socially inept in society but brilliant Doctor in profession who concocts a Potion in his Lab and due to a freak accident whereby he spills the mixture it becomes forever contaminated - never for the exact mixture to be concocted ever again (although I've always felt Dr Jekyll didn't try very hard to come up with the Potent Mixture again).

Richard Mansfield (played by Richard Latham) the very famous American Actor of the late 19th Century who once was famously questioned by Police in connection with the Jack the Ripper Murders because he drew suspicions from the public for his brilliant portrayal of the Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde at Londons Lyceum Theatre. We find him drunk and in a state of panic not wanting to go outside into the dark East End, taking shelter behind the piano at the Ten Bells. It is upon the discovery of who he is and with questionable awe wondering why he might be scared that he proceeds to retell the Story of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde using only the props that you would find in an old East London Boozer - Barrels, Tankards, Darts, Brasses and Yards of Ale all finely used to recreate the physical world of sleazy Victorian London with superb imagination and flare.

Once we moved past the East End Drunk Caricatures that I felt started the play weakly I and the audience began to let ourselves go with the highly original imagination of the 4 actors up on stage. And once the Story within a Story gets going there is little to fault it - with stealth, it fast becomes an enjoyable ride, that moves from scene to scene with quirky comedy and style that makes for a refreshing take on the old classic story, albeit simple, the Lighting Designer (Derek Caryle) gets the scene transitions really spot on with each new Scene.

The actors really did command and use the stage to its full potential, the night I was there, and despite a couple of errors (a potion wouldn't light up as planned - was clearly forgotten and enjoyed by all thanks to the the comedy improvisation that the Audience and the Actors clearly loved). All four actors put on a strong solid performance that wouldn't look out of place on a far larger stage in London's Westend.

William Hartley clearly commanded and stole the show with his representation of Henry Jekyll and Edward Hyde. Truly mesmerising, but I would imagine some of the credit probably needs to go to the Director (Jonny Kemp) or all the company who came up with the idea of making Edward Hyde a Strong powerful 19th Century Casanova (almost like Victorian England's remake of American Psycho's "Patrick Bateman") instead of a vicious Beast like monster - how Hyde is usually portrayed in past renditions.

Hartly though doesn't allow his presence to walk over the other 3 actors but instead compliments and enhances the performances of the others - especially incestuous love interest Mary Ann (Jekyll's Sister) played by Jennifer Bryden (who also plays Agnes, Mille De Rives, Pamela Jolly and Catriona) it couldn't be clearer that there is Chemistry between these two actors, effectively enhancing solid performances with sleazy romance and desire - never a bad thing when your exploring murky East End Life.

Arthur James (Publican, Poole, Lanyon, Macpoole, Train Conductor) a recent newcomer to the London stage having previously been a Captain in the British Army where he served both in Iraq and Afghanistan may only be playing minor less important roles in the story, it does not matter for the way he was able to bring them across to the audience added value and enjoyment on all levels - certainly a master of facial expressions and somebody to watch out for in future productions.

I congratulate this Production and hope it gets a longer run than the brief 2 weeks it has left in London. So if your bored of the west end and in dire need of of something refreshing to quench that blood thirsty split personality of yours (Stevenson would have us believe we all have one) then get yourself to the Kings Head before its gone.

9/10

Visit Canada? Not unless you plan to take out the Seal Clubbers.

2010-05-19T13:37:00.000+01:00

So the Olympics came and went and the world continues to rotate. Did the world leaders take a stand against the Canadian Government while they had a chance at the Canadian Winter Olympic Games? Did they Hell! Did a Gold, Silver or Bronze Medal Winner Make a protest on the podium? Not a chance - wasted opportunity!

The Seal Slaughter continues to go on and this is despite Canada using a Baby Seal in its new Advertising Campaign urging people to visit Canada. Kind of strange given what they do to the Baby Seals!

Inform your MP, Congressman or Leader of your outrage at Canadian Seal Clubbers and lets move into this Turbulant Teens with a Ban on the Seal Trade. Support PETA, Greenpeace and The Sea Shepherd - they're some of the few out they're trying to stop this Cold Blooded Murder.

The Canadians destruction of the planet with its Tar Sand Exploration is for another day - however you can find more details on that here.

I came, I saw and I got more votes than I expected... Yay!

2010-05-17T15:46:00.000+01:00

So it's all over and I didn't come last. I set out to to get involved in democracy and participate as a Candidate in a General Election for the 1st time. It was an enjoyable process. Though my resources were limited and my time was precious (having just recently started a new job). I felt that I was able to engage with some of the electorate. The majority of the electorate I engaged with probably at one stage or another read this blog or followed me or engaged with me on Twitter. I did get out on to the streets to spread the Pirate Party Polcies but the reality is - meeting everyone in Bethnal Green and Bow over the course of a month was always going to be an impossibility and unlike the other candidates I did have a day job (fortunately I haven't given that up).

CandidatesName Party Votes % +/-

Rushanara Ali Labour 21,784 42.9 +8.4
Ajmal Masroor Liberal Democrat 10,210 20.1 +7.8
Abjol Miah Respect-Unity Coalition 8,532 16.8 -19.8
Zakir Khan Conservative 7,071 13.9 +2.0
Jeffrey Marshall British National Party 1,405 2.8 +2.8
Farid Bakht Green 856 1.7 -2.8
Patrick Brooks Independent 277 0.5 +0.5
Alexander van Terheyden Pirate Party UK 213 0.4 +0.4
Hasib Hikmat United Voice 209 0.4 +0.4
Haji Choudhury Independent 100 0.2 +0.2
Ahmed Malik Independent 71 0.1 +0.1

Majority 11,574 22.8
Turnout 50,728 62.4 +10.9

I'd like to Thank everyone that e-mailed me and Tweeted me over the course of the election. If it wasn't for you guys I wouldn't of got the 213 votes! A lot more than I expected to get! I'd also like to congratulate Hasib Hikmat (United Voice) and Rushanara Ali (Labour) for running a good campaign. These 2 candidates stood out over the rest in my opinon. I'm disappointed the BNP did so well - but they still managed to lose their deposit - so nothing gained there for them. Which we should all be thankful for.
I hope that I might meet or at least make contact with Rushanara Ali the new Labour MP for Bethnal Green and Bow. I hope that she will take seriously the 3 main Pirate Party Policies. copyright and patent law; privacy law; and freedom of speech. If she stands by the Pirates on these policies then I and the rest of the Pirate Party would of succeeded in the election campaign in Bethnal Green and Bow. So please e-mail her, call her or write to her and push for her to stand against what the past government stood for and to seriously consider what the Pirate Party stands for.
Watch this Blog to see if anything changes going forward. Until the next election over and out on this one. If you would like to join the Pirate Party please go to http://www.pirateparty.org.uk/

Don't think I need to Mention it in much detail - but YES! I am very Happy that Gordon Brown has finally left Number 10! WOO!!!!!!!!!

PS: If anyone has a video of the Count at Mile End Stadium When it was broadcast on the news channels please do send me the link or a copy. I will post it here.

The Pirate Party - What's in the Name?

2010-05-05T00:22:00.004+01:00

Great write up on why the Pirate Party is called the Pirate Party........ by MC (good job MC!)

Many people wonder why we are called the Pirate Party UK. It is certainly an unusual name for a serious political party. However there is a good reason for this, and an interesting explanation. Put simply, our name was gifted to us by the very organisations which we oppose.

Many people in today's society believe in the right of the individual to have freedom of speech and expression, free access to information, free access to our cultural commons, to be free from undue government and corporate interference in our lives and affairs, and for each individual to exercise these rights as they see fit.

Unfortunately, there are also groups of people in society who, motivated by profit or control, would rather this not be the case. These groups believe that the collective arts which we all share should be guarded by a small group of cultural gatekeepers only to be released as they see fit, and entirely on their own terms. They believe that information of great mutual benefit to all of society such as pharmaceutical innovations and paradigm-shifting inventions, should be encumbered by preferential laws and patents, and they are are often vigorous and vicious in invoking the legal process to maintain this status quo. They believe that people should be unduly punished and barred from inclusion in modern society, especially regarding the right of Internet access, simply for doing what comes naturally to all of us and what makes us human: sharing. They believe that the right of the individual to proclaim the truth about a situation or share information that everyone should have a right to know should be subject to their approval, and if they don't like what they hear, then that individual's message should just vanish.

They are aware of the groups of people who think that information and culture should be free and unrestricted for the mutual benefit of all, and they have sought to denigrate them in the public sphere and even downright criminalise them. Thus, they have over the past few years and decades labelled this group of people as 'pirates' in the hopes of conjuring up images of criminals and outlaws, pillaging what they can from the 'decent folk'.

However, this attempt to discredit the cultural pro-freedom groups has backfired on them to the point where they have recently tried to drop the 'pirate' label out of fear of creating a flag to which these people can rally.

Their fears in this regard have already been realised, because that is exactly what has happened. The 'pirates' have become a worldwide movement and spawned an entire subculture in their own right, with millions of progressively-minded people who would describe themselves thus. Many of these people have officially organized and formed legitimate political parties in their respective countries, starting with the Swedish Piratpartiet in 2006, to counter the intense lobbying and creeping legislation in favour of the industry worldwide, at the expense of the public, that has been a hallmark of this last decade. Now in just four short years, there is a Pirate MEP sitting in the EU Parliament representing our beliefs throughout Europe, with another waiting for confirmation, more than 40 individual Pirate Parties worldwide, all interconnected in solidarity through Pirate Parties International, working within the system to effect our ideologies on a massive scale, tens of thousands of volunteers and helpers working every day towards this common goal, and millions more normal, everyday people globally who are happy and proud to identify themselves as a Pirate.

So, the governments and corporations who would prefer that they retain undue control over our shared culture and information, for the benefit of the few at the expense of the many, who would discredit our beliefs and who would cast us as outsiders, sought to give us a label with negative connotations to try and keep us at the fringes of society and our voices unheard. However to their surprise and annoyance, we have taken this label and made it our own, and have used it to rally one of the biggest worldwide political and ideological movements of the last century.

We couldn't have achieved what we have so far on the scale that we have without their help in this regard, and for this, we thank them. We are among hundreds of thousands who are proud to be Pirates.

Give Earth a Hand - Support Greenpeace

2010-04-21T23:37:00.002+01:00

When I'm not championing the Pirate cause I'm trying my best to raise as much awareness as possible for the problems that our precious small planet Earth faces. I've always supported Greenpeace and will continue doing so without hesitation as I stand by all their policies. So as I've found a few more readers lately I thought it would be appropriate to share the Latest Greenpeace Video with you.

Our planet is facing bigger challenges than ever before. Our ancient forests are being chopped down and our oceans recklessly fished out and polluted at a breathtaking pace. Whaling, toxic pollution, dirty coal, dangerous nuclear energy and genetically engineered crops threaten the quality and even sustainability of lives around the planet. Catastrophic climate change looms as governments and industry spend time and resources in hopes of increasing their profits while avoiding the changes necessary to curb carbon emissions.

Over the years, Greenpeace has had a positive impact around the world by bearing witness and convincing politicians and industry to change many harmful practices. Greenpeace have managed to protect enormous swaths of land, push through major environmental laws and sometimes even inspire business, government and science to put the good of the planet before financial gain.

But if you think the power of Greenpeace is with its ships, or its peaceful direct actions or their solutions-based campaigning - think again: it's you.

Greenpeace may not be a political party - but they do need the support from politicians who would align themselves with Greenpeace. Ask you're prospective MP if they really do have the conviction to carry through with Giving a Hand to Earth. If they can't or won't or simply try to say they do - then question them again until you're satisfied with your answer. On May the 6th - use your vote wisely to help save this planet as its not just about the Economy, Immigration and Crime its about the big things as well all wrapped up in one tiny little Blue Planet.

And once you've voted - or even before - maybe just maybe if you can spare a few pennies - Donate to Greenpeace or an organisation that is out there making a difference for this planet. As voting with your wallet really will count for something.

Bethnal Green & Bow - Vote Pirate Party on May 6th 2010

2010-04-20T14:06:00.001+01:00

Ok - It's Official I have put myself forward for the 2010 UK Election. I will be standing in Bethnal Green and Bow, an area of London I hold close to my heart, an area that over the years has gone through some dramatic change.

I decided to stand as a Candidate because I felt the voters of Bethnal Green and Bow simply didn't have any choice when it came to them deciding on who to give their vote to. This is the current choice:

Rushanara Ali - Labour
Farid Bakht - Green
Zakir Khan - Conservative
Ajmal Masroor - Liberal Democrat
Abjol Miah - Respect
Alexander van Terheyden - Pirate Party UK

Labour probably have the most highly educated Politician on the list but should she really be a shoe in when she has spent her entire career focusing on becoming a Minister for Parliament? Does the Oxford Lady really have enough life experience? And why should anyone vote for Gordon Browns Labour Party ever again?
The Green Candidate probably has the biggest heart - but I have seen very little evidence to suggest he really does have any green credentials. This Guy may as well represent the Grey Party!
The Conservatives, Liberals and Respect can effectively be grouped into the same box (in this constituency only) - as far as I've learnt they've effectively been sponsored by the East London Mosque. So as long as the Mosque gets a candidate elected their very happy.

But where does this leave those of us who don't give a damn for religion? Or align ourselves with the far right or left? Effectively you're without a vote. Hence another reason for me to step up to the plate.
If you read my blog you will have a pretty good idea on where I come from in regards to Government Policy, Green Issues and Soceity. But I think its' important that I list to you what I stand for as a Pirate Party Candidate:

Candidate Biography

Born in the UK, I grew up in Cambridge before embarking to live a life in London where I went to University and have lived and worked for just over 10years. Bethnal Green and Bow (Tower Hamlets) was the 1st place I lived in London and I have had a permanent base there ever since. I have been actively involved in local politics for the last 10years in the East of London - focusing on helping the more deprived areas of London as they seem to be forgotten under the Labour Government. I believe in the Right to Freedom and I will always fight oppression by those who stand to oppress mine and anyone elses freedom. I don't believe in the Big Brother state and believe we need to take a stand against it before we fall in any deeper into George Orwells 1984 - something under Gordon Browns Government we have rapidly moved towards if not already surpassed. I believe the British public should not be treated as criminals for simply enjoying Music - this the Pirate Party takes very seriously. None of the other UK parties stand for Freedom in the same way the Pirate Party does. This Government chooses to label you as a criminal for infringing copyright law and I simply won't put up with it. The only way to make a change is to get politically involved. As a Pirate I will fight for the common decent citizens who choose to celebrate life rather than oppress life.

I believe in equality in Bethnal Green - I don't believe Politics should be influenced by a religious agenda. I refuse to let corporations, religious organisations and corrupt money influence me into helping out all people of Bethanl Green and Bow. Race, Religion and Class will not define my policies - If the people need help and services than as your MP I will fight for these services no matter your creed - unlike the other candidates in Bethnal Green and Bow who are fighting for your vote.
Let's Address a Few Things

How did you get involved with the Pirate Party UK and why?

I have been very politically active ever since my school and University days, after University I was forced to pay off the debts I had accumulated by joining the City of London working in the Financial Sector. This brought me back into the black but it also allowed me to see the world - to the extent where I took a couple of years off in my late 20's to Volunteer in Central America, the Far East as well as working on the Caribbean Island of Utila (An Original Pirate Colony) whereby I saw life isn't just about Money - its about Freedom, its about standing up aganist those that oppress this world.

And what better policies can there be than:

We want to reform copyright and patent law to make it suitable for the modern age and its original purpose. We want to end the excessive surveillance, profiling, tracking and monitoring of innocent people by Government and large businesses. We want to ensure that everyone has real freedom of speech and real freedom to enjoy and participate in our shared culture.

I have moved away from the Conservatives (I represented them as a Candidate previously in Hackney - Hoxton ward) because they don't believe in these freedoms. While they have strong economic policies they simply don't give enough of damn about the common man for me to be able to allign myself with them anymore.

What are the Pirates Key Policies? Which one would you class as most important?

Core Policies - I support all of them.

1 Copyright and Patent Policies 1.1 Copyright to apply to commercial exploitation only. 1.2 We want all copyright durations to be reduced to a fairer length. 1.3 We want a 'government health warning' on products containing DRM technology. 1.4 There should be no additional period of copyright protection for format changes 1.5 We think there should be no blank media taxes. 1.6 Where patents don't promote innovation, or actively prevent it, we'll scrap them 1.7 We feel that everything funded by the taxpayer should be made available to the public under a Creative Commons or similar licence, or public domain 1.8 All the BBC's output will be available online under a Creative Commons or similar licence. 1.9 We feel that large, national events shall continue to be accessible via terrestrial broadcast services. 1.10 We want the Government to switch to open source software where practical. 2 Privacy Policies 2.1 We believe privacy of the individual should be sought at all times 2.2 We feel citizens should have the right to private and confidential communication; 2.3 We strongly oppose compulsory ID cards 2.4 The proposed National Identity Register 2.5 We want stronger data protection laws 2.6 We want a full review of the Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act 2000 2.7 We want clear laws on acceptable use of CCTV 2.8 We want clearer guidelines and restrictions on the use of DNA records by authorities 2.9 We want increased government transparency and accountability 3 Freedom of Speech Policies 3.1 We believe that the Internet is instrumental to freedom of speech 3.2 We will encourage citizens of all nations to communicate freely, share their culture, and maintain their right to privacy 3.3 Whistleblowers 3.4 Photography in public places 3.5 We will encourage libraries and museums to digitise their content 3.6 We want better computing education in schools 3.7 UK libel law should not be used to smother free speech 3.8 We want to promote the inclusion of accessibility features, subtitles, audio descriptions etc for the disabled

Its hard to pick a favourite out of all those policies but the Photography in public spaces is very close to my heart having been witness to unruly establishment figures trying to stop photographers in central London. I am very much against the ID Cards - having previously been involved in campaigning against them.

I believe in freedom of speech especially on the internet - hence I have been involved in supporting WikiLeaks through its crisis. However 1.1 - is the most important - as prosecuting a family because their son or daughter is downloading a few music tracks for non commercial exploitation is unacceptable. I DJ in Shoreditch from time to time and I know how important it is to have music freely available - however I also know that it is important to support an artist should you use his/her work for commercial reasons - if its for pure enjoyment and pleasure then that copyright should be flexible.

Non-Pirate Policies

The Pirate Party UK encourages its Candidates to talk to their constituents and make up their own mind on any policies that are not part of the PPUK's core policies and/or manifesto.

Please read my blog - everything I stand for on this blog I will stand for in parliament.

However to note:

I believe in the right to free Education for Life
I believe in a fair Tax System
I believe in reducing the Budget Deficit
I believe our borders should be controlled more effectively through a points based system of immigration and I believe our society can one day leave Racism behind.
I believe we should be spending money on fighting Poverty
I believe we should withdraw our troops and stop aiding the American War Machine
I believe we need to act to Save the Planet
I believe in Green Energy and not Coal, Oil or Nuclear

Please follow me on www.twitter.com/vanterheyden

Consider voting Pirate on May 6th

Blue Fish Tuna ban isn't implemented enabling them to be fished to extinction

2010-03-18T15:55:00.001Z

Today - I heard the bill to pass a ban on fishing for Atlantic Blue Fin Tuna was overturned. Libya and a small number of Fishing Nations that use the Atlantic as their own personal Refrigerator are now close to fishing the Atlantic Dry.

If you choose to have Children or Grandchildren - there is a chance they will live in a world where there is no Blue Fin Tuna. Possibly they will live in a world where there is no fish in our oceans.

Take a stand - Support Greenpeace and lobby your member of parliament/congress and bring the fishing industry under control.

Big Business fooling the world with Green claims when in fact its still behaving like the Grim Reaper

2010-03-11T15:34:00.000Z

As money pours into the Developing world looking for new places to invest – Wall Street and the tycoons are getting carried away in typical fashion. When dollars infect investors minds - people tend to forget about the impact there investments might have on local people and the environment. The flow of money into the Asian economies has been immense in recent years. One could argue this has helped these countries gain a bigger standing on the world economic stage – which is fine if you’re only goal as a 3rd world country is trying to compete with the USA of Japan, but life shouldn’t be this fickle. What generally tends to happen; where people are concerned, those not at the top of the pyramid won’t prosper and many more will suffer, none more so than Nature and the Environment in Indonesia.

Indonesia is an immense country – it has more bio-diversity than any other place in the world. Its people are rich in culture but more importantly the wildlife is found no where else round the world. If you’re a fan of nature – Indonesia is paradise. Unfortunately this is the 21st Century; big business couldn’t give a damn about paradise as long as there’s a buck to be made. Especially big business involved in the Palm Oil industry. Now many that know me have heard my rants about Palm Oil before, but I personally believe you can’t lay this matter to rest until this destructive business is stopped.

So what is Palm Oil?

Palm oil is an edible plant oil derived from the pulp of the fruit of the oil palm Elaeis guineensis. Palm oil is one of the few vegetable oils high in saturated fats. Others include palm kernel oil (made from the Elaeis guineensis seed) and coconut oil (made from the seed of the coconut palm). Palm oil is a very common cooking ingredient in southeast Asia and the tropical belt of Africa. Its increasing use in the commercial food industry in other parts of the world is buoyed by its cheaper pricing and the high oxidative stability of the refined product[

Palm oil, like other vegetable oils, can be used to create biodiesel for internal combustion engines. Biodiesel has been falsely promoted as a renewable energy source to reduce net emissions of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere. Therefore, biodiesel is seen as a way to decrease the impact of the greenhouse effect and as a way of diversifying energy supplies to assist national energy security plans. However, this is clearly bullshit. And if you can't see the argument on why biodiesel from Palm Oil can’t reduce C02 you really need your head examining.

In 2007, Indonesia became the top producer of palm oil, surpassing Malaysia. The Oil effectively comes from plantations in Sumatra, Kalimantan, Indonesian Peninsula and Papua New Guinea. It is then brought to the mills and refineries located either in Indonesia or shipped oversseas to be refined, effectively adding to the Carbon Footprint. Most Palm Oil is either Refined in Indonesia, Malaysia or shipped to the Rotterdam refinery to handle 300,000 tpa of palm oil.

So what are the Problems?

There are so many problems associated with the Palm Oil Industry you effectively could study it as a degree.

The short documentary below concerns the social, environmental, and economic impacts of palm oil production in Indonesia, including the loss of over 2.8 million hectares of primary rainforest each year. That’s six football fields every minute! Palm Oil is now an integral part of Indonesias economy. However, its impacts on local communities are little known, and include conflicts over human rights, land rights, and environmental protection.

Fresh land clearances, especially in Borneo, are contentious for their environmental impact. NGO’s, many international bodies and myself have been warning for a long time that, despite thousands of square kilometres of land standing unplanted in Indonesia, tropical hardwood forests are being cleared for palm oil plantations. Furthermore, as the remaining unprotected lowland forest dwindles, developers are planting on peat swamp land, using drainage that unlocks the carbon held in the ground; the oxidation process of the peat can release 5,000 to 10,000 years worth of stored carbon. Drained peat is also very susceptible and classed as high risk when it comes to forest fire, and there is a clear record of fire being used to clear vegetation for palm oil development in Indonesia. Drought and man-made clearances have led to massive uncontrolled forest fires over recent years, covering parts of Southeast Asia in haze and leading to an international crisis with Malaysia. These fires have been variously blamed on a government with little ability to enforce its own laws while impoverished small farmers and large plantation owners illegally burn and clear forests and peat lands to reap the developmental benefits of environmentally-valuable land.

Palm oil production has been documented as a cause of substantial and often irreversible damage to the natural environment. Its impacts include: deforestation, habitat loss of critically endangered species, and a significant increase in greenhouse gas emissions.

Environmental groups such as Greenpeace claim that the deforestation caused by making way for oil palm plantations is far more damaging for the climate than the benefits gained by switching to biofuel.

Thousands of species many unidentified are being put at risk every from the destruction of their natural habitats all because big business wants its palm oil – so it can sell it to the consumer labeled as Vegetable Oil. Did you Know Flora Margarine is labeled as containing vegetable Oil but in fact that vegetable oil comes from Palm Oil plantations in Indonesia.

So how can I avoid products containing palm oil?

Palm oil is found in about one in ten of the goods we buy from supermarkets. This includes:

o Soap

o Chocolate

o Toothpaste

o Biscuits

o Muesli

o Cosmetics – that means 50% of LIPSTICK sold and a lot of that crap in your beauty bag!

Rainforest in your shopping basket

Palm oil plantations are often grown on land that was once rainforest. In Indonesia, the huge demand for palm oil is putting pressure on endangered species like:

o Tigers

o Elephants

o Orang-utans

Laws meant to protect rainforest are often too weak to withstand the demands of palm oil companies for new plantations. As plantations expand, local people are being displaced from their community forest land. Many communities battle for years for the return of just a small plot. Land and water supplies can become degraded and polluted as palm oil production is intensive and relies on pesticides.

Even the greenest consumer will struggle to avoid all products with palm oil in them. This is because palm oil is often listed as vegetable oil on product labels.

A boycott would be impossible and perhaps irresponsible - it wouldn't help communities who are already struggling to survive on less than a living wage.

British businesses are involved at every level of the supply chain, from investor to retailer. However, Friends of the Earth thinks they could do a lot more to source and develop sustainable palm oil production.

We need new rules for big business to be accountable for their social and environmental impact.

Ethical shopping alone won't change the behaviour of the palm oil industries. New rules are needed to hold companies accountable for the damage they do.

As well as changing your shopping and petitioning the Government to stop with the senseless implementation of Bio Fuels that contain Palm Oil. You can donate to organisations that give a damn about the world. Such as Greenpeace, WWF and Friends of the Earth.

How long can we stand by and do nothing while Orangutans are macheted and burnt to death by the Palm Oil Business?

God Bless America - O American War Machine!

2010-03-03T18:25:00.003Z

It’s been well over a year now since Barrack Obama became President. I had hoped he would of undone most of the tyranny and terrorism the Bush/Cheney Administration had inflicted on this world. But alas – it would seem he is having a hard time pushing the Halliburton’s of this world out of the Senates bed. Why does America put up with it? Is every American really this selfish that he or she doesn’t realise the world is being conquered and punished once again by US Military strength all so that it can control the Economics of every corner of the globe. The US establishment doesn’t care who it hurts in getting what it wants. If there is a dollar to be made does it matter if someone dies? Not for corporation USA! God Bless America!

The USA isn’t hated by the majority of the world because of its so called freedoms – it is hated by the majority of the world because it chooses to shit on anyone else who gets in its way. There are many good Americans in the USA but when your government is overrun by corporations who control all legislation and policy the average American citizen who understands the truth is often silenced because how can they stand up to the might of the US Military and every private contractor aligned to the US military? They simply can’t – however on mass I’d like to think as an outsider they certainly could make a go of it.

I believe President Obama to be a good man – he is trying to change US Foreign Policy, he has engaged with the Middle East and he has a vision for a better future. However, simply by looking at the nightmare he has had at trying to pass a healthcare bill that would give every American healthcare – he has struggled. The reason he has struggled = corporations who will lose profits should healthcare reform be pushed through; have been allowed to campaign and buy senators and governors. It seems when it comes to US politics everyone has a price! Amazing to see the close similarities with the US government and many 3rd world governments who have been criticised by previous US administrations.

As I have stated and I will state it again there are good Americans but what hope do they have to speak out when the US Networks rarely want to inform them of the atrocities the US is committing on a daily basis (The US Networks are owned by those who have interests to play nice with the US Military Machine). And if US citizens do speak out, how can they speak louder than the lobbyists who lobby every day in Washington for Big Oil, Arms, Tobacco, 3rd World Labour Exploitation and pure profit no matter who gets in the way. How can a poor family who can’t afford healthcare afford to go to Washington to lobby every senator on a daily basis with expensive lunches just to convince the corrupt Senators to vote yes for free health care for all?

America will never be the land of the free and righteous until it bans lobbyists and power isn’t bought. Yes there are good senators out there but can we safely say there are many? The system is similar elsewhere in the world over but when you have the most powerful country in the world being bought by profit before life companies is there any hope for this world and America?

Below is a video that highlights what Americas war is doing to those under fire. The US military machine does not want you to view this video.

If you allow Psychos’ to join the military (which they do by allowing Moral wavers) you will get military men committing atrocities again and again. America you must be so proud!

The US Government hates it when the truth gets leaked and those in power would rather you didn’t ever know the truth about how the US is destroying nations. The US Government has many secrets. The above just being a fraction of some of the nasty secrets it hides on a daily basis.
Where is that Change Obama?

In case you believe those that go to war in the 21st century – think again. Each man and woman who goes to war for the US Machine wearing the American/British or UN Flag on their sleeve is not a hero – they are simply brainwashed. Yes from time to time each will carry out very bravely a heroic act to help and save their people or sometimes a local. But the reality is we have no right to be in these countries – we are only there because it makes our huge corporations money. These men and women fighting now are not the heroes of the 1st and 2nd World Wars. Those men and women then didn’t have a choice. The men and women today have a choice and really shouldn’t be there – unless of course they own shares in Boeing, Halliburton, Exxon Mobil, Lockheed Martin or some other shady institution and are looking for a cosy retirement happy in the knowledge they have supported terror.

God Bless the US Taxpayer for funding almost every war of the last 100years. All you have achieved is allow the rich to get richer at the expense of everyone else.

I Feel love for War Veterans but those who have been signing up to war now will get little love. Do I draw the line after 1945? 1955? 1965? 1991? 2001? Who really knows but I see no justification for any current war except for putting profits before morals.

God Bless the American War Machine. Proving once again there is no God.

Greece in Crisis - I Predict a Riot!

2010-02-25T18:09:00.000Z

An informative news report on the Greece Crisis. Greece isn't going to get bailed out and like Dominoes Spain, Portugal and others will follow. What was once seen as such a good idea - The Euro Zone is collapsing like a house of cards as the weak can't keep up with the Power Hungry dominant economies like Germany. Another example of Goldman Sachs of profiting from other peoples suffering. Max Keiser Says it very well in the interview below.

Remember the IMF is Goldman Sachs

Bad news for the PIGS?

If you use Twitter and have over 100 Followers - Get paid for your Tweets - http://bit.ly/7KnNf0

Why have bread when you can have a schadenfreude

Vancouver 2010

2010-02-10T16:21:00.000Z

So it's 2010 and on schedule the Canadians are going to be hosting the Winter Olympics. While this event will be an awesome spectacular to watch (even though without fail the Brits will probably fail to get any medals except in the bizarre sports/games like Curling). The Canadians will probably sweep the board - but is it right for the Canadians to feel proud when within weeks after the Olympics they will begin their Annual Seal Clubbing extravaganza!

Yes that's right, Thousands of Baby seals who have only just emerged into the cold world who will still be suckling on their mums nipples will be brutally attacked by blood thirsty Canadians who feel they have the right to a mass slaughter that is easily comparable to Cambodia carried out by Pol Pot.

The annual seal bloodbath, the largest slaughter of marine mammals on Earth, is scheduled to begin just after the Olympics end. Tens of thousands of harp seals, most of whom are in their very first weeks of life, will be bludgeoned and shot to death and then skinned for coats that no one (except the babies themselves!) wants or needs. Their mothers, who are spared because fur traders don't want their pelts, will mourn and wail as their babies are killed right in front of them and their pups' bodies are left to rot on the ice.

Even as compassionate people everywhere raise their voices against the seal slaughter, the Canadian government callously digs in its heels. The government is challenging the European Union's recent ban on the importation of Canadian seal fur and is aggressively looking for new markets for seal products—which are abhorred in the Western world—in places such as China.

Unfortunately this annual carnage puts a dim light on Canada hosting the winter Games and this is without mentioning Canada's Destructive Oil Exploration - completely disregarding the impact they are having on Nature and the Environment. Until Canada stops extracting Oil from the Oil Sands we can't really take this country seriously.

The tar sands in the province of Alberta, Canada are a vast area of thick bitumen petroleum mixed with sand, clay and water. At present, the tar sands produce about one million barrels of synthetic crude oil a day. The tar sands produce the dirtiest oil in the world. The problems from production include: destruction of forested lands, contamination of huge quantities of water, enormous energy requirements to release oil, greenhouse gas emissions, and impacts on First Nations and other people.

Canada has failed to live up to the commitment it made in signing the Kyoto Protocol to take steps to reduce greenhouse gas emissions by six per cent from 1990 levels by 2012. The huge emissions of greenhouse gases from the tar sands make it much more difficult for Canada to meet its obligations.
Facts on the tar sands:

◦Fastest growing source of greenhouse gas (GHG) emissions in Canada

◦Production expected to grow to between three and five million barrels of oil a day by 2020

◦Produces 40 million tonnes of greenhouse gas emissions currently; nearly the emissions of the Czech Republic

◦Tar sands GHG emissions may double by 2015,

◦By 2020 tar sands GHGs will likely increase to 141 million tonnes, double the current emissions of all cars and trucks in Canada

◦Producing oil from the tar sands releases three to five times more GHG emissions than oil from conventional sources and uses three to five barrels of water to get a barrel of oil---the dirty oil problem

◦Every day tar sands producers burn 600 million cubic feet of natural gas to produce tar sands oil, enough natural gas to heat three million Canadian homes

◦Tar sands production is licensed to use more water a day than Alberta's two major cities---Calgary and Edmonton---combined

◦90 per cent of the water used in the tar sands is highly contaminated and ends up in huge tailings ponds that already cover 50 square kilometers. Contaminants include naphthenic acids and mercury.

◦Tailings ponds adjacent to rivers pose an enormous threat of contamination of fresh water and destruction of wildlife

◦A vast area of the boreal forest is being destroyed by tar sands operations, roads and pipelines; fragmenting forests and wildlife habitats and forcing the sensitive woodland caribou out of its home

◦First Nations communities downstream of the tar sands have reported elevated levels of rare cancers. Tar sands pollution has been associated with embryonic deformity, mortality and other biological impacts in fish in the Athabasca River.

Now while you may think it is unjust for a Brit to bitch about Canada you may be right - but if you took this stance on everything then nothing would change. The UK has many problems - ethical (War on so called Terror etc) and general crap leadership (Gordon Brown). However, just because the UK has problems I don't think it's acceptable to ignore other countries messing up this planet. And Yes Canada you are tainted in Polluting Sludge and Blood - you must change if this world is to survive.

If you feel the urge you can donate to Greenpeace - click here - as they are bringing the world to account for polluting more than any other organisation. And if you feel the urge to donate to PETA (as they will be protesting hard at the Vancouver Olympics) click here.

Enjoy the Winter Games!

Gordon Brown the Worst PM and biggest Liar of a Generation

2010-02-05T09:32:00.001Z

In case you were wondering if Gordon Brown was a liar. Here is a clip of just a few of his thousands of lies.

Words from you tube::

Gordon Brown has been the worst Primeminister of the UK of this Generation. His lies started when he became Chancelor of the Exchequer back in 1997. And they have continued ever since. He has sucked the soul and the life out of the British. He implemented stealth taxes at every opportunity. He introduced Tuition fees in 1998 - effectively putting the UK (but of course not Scotland) into the dark ages. Funny how Europe can offer free education to their student and probably forever will and England, Wales and Northern Ireland can't! Whereas Scots because we have Scottish PM get free education. I love the Scots and I believe they should have free education but so too should everyone else in the UK.

He has built over Green Belt land with complete disregard for English Wildlife, Nature and simply natural beauty all to aid his total demolition of what England was. He is a Scot who has successfully split the UK into segments - making it powerless - shafting it with red tape and pointless laws that protect no one but the criminals and the elite.

With the Aid of dicks like Alistair Campbell (professional spin doctor) he has remained in power since 1997 - pulling the wool over peoples eyes again and again. He took the credit for the boom years and blames the world for the Recession. And yet because of his shit policies the UK has suffered more than any other european nation.

I can't wait for the day when this man leaves number 10. That day can't come a moment too soon.

Gordon Brown I vote you worst Briton of the 20th and 21st Century. Two awards you deserve more than anyone else by a long shot.

Remember to vote when this appauling PM finally calls an election. By not voting - he has a chance of remaining in power. You also insult everything our Ancestors faught for. Vote wisely - its your choice - but you must vote. Avoid voting for fascists, religious nutters, brain dead lazy been there seen that MPs who have been in power for ages. If your voting paper offers you no real alternative to Brown vote Independent or Green but do vote. Imagine Parliment with 400 Independents - that would be a good day. But please vote don't be ignorant and allow this man and his criminal gang of MPs to get away with any more underhand politics that do nothing to serve the UK.

PMQs: Brown on army spending and voting reform (03Feb10)

2010-02-04T20:29:00.001Z

As the Election fast Approachs - it is clear as daylight that Brown the most appauling Primeminister that has ever graced the halls of Westminister is hanging on to his last gasp of stolen air. Does this man wake up and say to himself "hmm - I wonder how many lies I can get away with today!"

The day Brown leaves Number 10 and is ousted from Politics can't come soon enough!

Student Fees! What Student Fees!

£50k slush fund for Central Office - What £50k!

Julian Casablancas - 11th Dimension Music Video (HD) - 5 stars!

2010-01-11T00:54:00.001Z

I know I've mentioned this song before and I'm sure you've seen the video on MTV or Youtube by now. But what an awesome song. Next time i'm on my decks I'm mixing the hell out of this song. This song is going to create a truly fabulous mashup - be warned!

In the cold freezing temps of January 2010 Banks are warned.... to prepare for the Hawks

2010-01-07T23:57:00.001Z

A Vague announcement was made to the Banking community today however it was much more than an announcement meant to sound vague it was a serious warning. The Federal Reserve effectively came out and warned all banks (large and small) to make sure their house was in order. Effectively what they said was

“Protect your capital, investments and risk because we the FED with Ben Bernanke at the helm will be increasing Interest Rates very soon!”

Stocks reacted to this announcement as soon as they got wind of it by selling off fractionally however the market was immediately bid up as per usual by the lemmings that seem to be on every bid these days. No surprise there then – bad news has been greeted time and time again with buying – how else does one explain this market being up almost 70% since March 2009 lows. This market is extremely overbought with the DOW (currently 10,607) and S&P 500 (1142) at P/E levels not seen in over a decade. Even the Weekly and Hourly RSI levels are way above 70%. Something will hit this market and this will likely be the realism that these values are underserved and I wouldn’t be surprised if you saw this market adjust its self with a correction by losing 10-20% in a very short period of time. It could be rates going up suddenly that causes the carnage that is undoubtedly coming and with today’s vague announcement – rates are certainly going up sooner than previously indicated.

I have included the Bloomberg Newswire announcement below for more details:

Jan. 7 (Bloomberg) -- U.S. regulators including the Federal Reserve warned banks to guard against possible losses from an end to low interest rates and reduce exposure or raise capital if needed.

“In the current environment of historically low short-term interest rates, it is important for institutions to have robust processes for measuring and, where necessary, mitigating their exposure to potential increases in interest rates,”

the Federal Financial Institutions Examination Council, made up of agencies including the Fed and the Federal Deposit Insurance Corp., said in a statement today.

Several U.S. central bankers have called for raising interest rates at a faster pace than increases in the past, while the Fed hasn’t said when or how quickly it plans to lift borrowing costs from a record low.

The regulators told banks to run stress tests with scenarios including “instantaneous and significant changes” in rates and “substantial changes in rates over time,” including shifts of as much as 4 percentage points.

“Institutions should ensure their scenarios are severe but plausible in light of the existing level of rates and the interest-rate cycle,” the advisory said.

Fed Governor Kevin Warsh said in September that rates may need to rise with “greater swiftness than is modern central bank custom.” Philadelphia Fed President Charles Plosser said the same month that officials “need to be prepared” for the possibility they will have to raise interest rates in steps of 0.50 or 0.75 percentage point, as policy makers did when they cut rates.

Talking about Dub in 2010

2010-01-06T19:46:00.013Z

Happy New Year! It’s Twenty Ten (not two thousand and ten) – you didn’t say it was one thousand and ninety in 1990! Just an observation I’ve noticed as this New Year and New Decade has begun. And yes it is a New Decade – did the Seventies continue into 1980! No! Of course not!

So I spent the New Year in Germany and between the fattening (but very tasty food) and amazing beer I noticed how Germans can’t help themselves and dub everything that appears on their TV Channels. Why on earth would they want to do this?! Are they all Children? I can understand Dubbing Children’s Television (successfully done with the Magic Roundabout from French to English). For Children it would be unfair on them as they may struggle to keep up with all the subtitles when they are very young and TV while often mind numbing is great escapism and allows their parents some peace but do Adults really need anything to be dubbed?

• Dubbing is the post-production process of recording and replacing voices on a motion picture or television soundtrack subsequent to the original shooting schedule. The term most commonly refers to the substitution of the voices of the actors shown on the screen by those of different performers, who may be speaking a different language.

If I watch a French, German, Italian, Japanese or Korean Film I want to watch that film in its original language. Nothing is more infuriating than hearing a strange voice out of synch on an actor who can bring across the emotion and acting far better than some native in a dubbing studio with his or her own voice.

Are people that mentally retarded that they can’t keep up with subtitles?

And why is it only certain countries that seem to have habits for dubbing? Check out the map below:

(BLUE): English: Dubbing films in Europe
Dubbing only for children: Otherwise solely subtitles

(ORANGE): Mixed areas: Countries using occasionally full-cast dubbing otherwise solely subtitles

(YELLOW): Voice-over: Countries using usually one or just a couple of voice actors whereas the original soundtrack persists

(RED) General dubbing: Countries using exclusively a full-cast dubbing, both for films and for TV series

(STRIPES) Countries which occasionally produce own dubbings but generally using dubbing versions of other countries since their languages are quite similar to each other and the audience is also able to understand it without any problems. (Belgium and Slovakia)

According to Wikipedia (yes I know it isn’t a reliable source but its good enough for this argument) In the French, German, Spanish, Russian (Theatrical release and high profile video only) and Italian-speaking markets of Europe, almost all foreign films and television shows are dubbed. There are few opportunities to watch foreign movies in their original versions and even in the largest cities there are few cinemas that screen original versions with subtitles, or without any translation.

Now given that I’m writing this rant in English it is very unlikely a German or a French man is going to pick up what I’m saying and agree with me. But I would just like to say for the record I can’t stand watching a dubbed movie. Even though I enjoyed watching dubbed Kung Fu Movies as a kid I now insist on all Kung Fu Movies to be in their original format – yes I miss watching their lips move in comical fashion with a silly American Voice dubbed over – but this was funny because this was all that was available back then. In an international global community shouldn’t we be appreciating art in its original intended format and not sit their lazily watching a dubbed film?

Example of Comedy Kung Fu Dubbing – Funny but not acceptable for every movie released!

I heard an argument that the Germans don’t produce any worthy films so they have to dub everything, but this argument is simply false German cinema is alive and well and very much on the ball and so too is the majority of cinema coming out of countries where dubbing is rife.

An Example of Great German Cinema – 9/10 – A must see film based on a True Story

The Baader Meinhof Complex – Truly Awesome German Cinema

I wouldn’t watch this dubbed so why would a German want to watch an English Language film Dubbed? Answers on a postcard please or alternatively leave a comment below.

Ron Paul slates Bernanke - although claiming he deserves to be Person of the Year

2009-12-22T10:00:00.012Z

Ben Bernanke - effectively the most powerful man in the known world - a man who can create money out of thin air in the form of the Worlds Reserve currency. Bernanke, claimed in 2007 and 2008 that everything was ok and that no recession was going to take place and he saw no problems in the housing bubble. And yet despite getting this horribly wrong - this man now claims we are on the road to recovery and we have nothing to worry about by the asset bubble that has now been created since free money was given to each and every bank that was effectively responsible for bringing down the financial system. Him, Hank Paulson (ex Goldman Sachs - Masters of the Universe - no Longer Treasury Secretary)and now Timothy Geithner have effectively spent the last 12months+ screwing over main street USA all so Wall Street and Global Finance could pick themselves back up and monopolise more and more financial power.

Thanks to Ben Bernanke and his All knowing Federal Masters of Finance, Inflation is going to hit the Worlds Economy like a ton of bricks (but they deny this). Job losses intensified under his watch (but it's ok because Wall Street will get their bonuses), We will enter recession again and this will be classed as the second dip of a double dip recession (and yet Bernanke claims this to be a rare event in financial history so it won't happen - how a man who has got it so wrong so many times can be so sure of himself I have no idea)!

Anyway - here is Ron Paul (a US Congressman - one of the few with a head on his shoulders) saying it how it is. Unfortunatly it is Fox News interviewing him - but if you ignore what they're saying you will see Ron Paul speaking a lot of sense.

see http://bit.ly/xmXYs an earlier post if you're not conivinced how badly Bernanke got it wrong before

A Christmas Number 1 that we can once again enjoy - it's been long overdue....

2009-12-21T11:23:00.015Z

Christmas is a fun time of the year although I have to admit it makes me cringe when I see the commercialism of it all. Now I’m not religious so in regards to consumerism taking Christmas away from the religious meaning of Christmas I really couldn’t care. However, what I do mind are consumer traditions that seem to have apprehended Christmas. What’s with caring about the Christmas Number 1 on the Pop Charts about anymore? Now when Singles were singles and the internet didn’t exist I understood this. The day’s when The Beatles, Pink Floyd or even The Pet Shop Boys were number 1’s – these were good days. But the reality is – who really buys singles anymore? Do you really go into HMV and spend £1.99 to £3.99 on a single that after a couple of weeks will then sit on your CD Rack for eternity?

I know back in the 80’s and early 90’s I used to from time to time by the odd single. But this was because the only way I could listen to music I wanted to hear other than the crap BBC Radio or the local Radio station would play would be to buy my own music. These days we have file sharing peer-to-peer networks, Spotify, Beatport and Albums sold online for the price of a single (check eBay, CD-WOW, Play etc etc). However, I have to admit unless the artist is seriously talented and is offering something exceptional with their album it’s not worth buying the CD anymore when you can commit a crime and download it for free online. So if it’s hard to see value in buying an album that costs the same as a single – why would you buy a single?

But most of all, what I really don’t get is why anyone Buys anything off iTunes?

Why would you pay to have a song stored on your computer or your iPod which you could very well easily get off a p2p network at some point for free? And if you must pay, why pay the same price for that song or album when you could pay the same or less and be holding the physical CD or Records in your mits and at least take in the inlet, the smell of vinyl, the touch etc? All iTunes is giving you is a few megabits of information which in time may be lost from your hard disk or lost when you break your iPod. At least having the physical album – you can upload it again to a new computer if your computer suffers the indecency and dies with shame at the hands of virus.

Anyway going back to the original point I set out to make because it’s Christmas that magical time of year. iTunes for once did a good thing even though I disagree with the corporate machine that is iTunes. I refuse to make Apple any richer (hence I’ve never purchased a song on iTunes), however I do commend those that bought the Rage Against the Machine Single “Killing in the Name” as they effectively whipped a very smug smile off the Anti-Christ of Music that is Simon Cowell.

Simon Cowell is effectively responsible for killing music the world over – he has produced nothing of value and it’s thanks to the Morons who support him by watching shows like X-Factor, Britains Got Talent and American Idol that give this useless individual the power he now has. Every time some saddist watches one of his shows (those with ratings boxes at least) his shows go higher in the ratings – bringing in more advertising revenue for him, and every time a braindead individual picks up their phone to vote for which unoriginal singer should win they line his pockets with even more money effectively greasing the world of music into a sterile and boring state while year after year the talentless Cowell becomes more and more powerful.

Although is it really Raging Against the Machine to buy the song from iTunes? And by having a Sony band go up against a Song manufactured pop pile of cack only really makes Sony’s Profits bigger. It would have been better to see an independent label top the charts - maybe. However, the “Fuck you I won’t do what you told me” lyrics are an awesome finger up at the Sterile dull moronic establishment that is X-Factor.

Anyway – RANT OVER!

It’s Christmas and I thought it would be a good idea to post some of more Christmas Music that hasn’t been wrecked and destroyed by the hands of Simon Cowell.

Julian Casablancas’s Christmas Song - “I wish it was Christmas Today”

Don’t worry Christmas comes around every year so not long now.

The Best XMAS Song Ever and yet it didn’t go to Number 1 – however it was up against some very stiff and fine Non X-Factor Competition that year – I give you the Pogues with Kirsty Macoll.

And now here is a selection of the best Number 1’s from 1961 onwards:

1961 – Danny Williams – Moon River

1964 – The Beatles – I Feel Fine

1965 – The Beatles – DayTripper

1966 – The Beatles – Hello, Goodbye

1969 – (this is a classic I’m sure you will agree) – Rolf Harris – Two Little Boys

1973 – Slade – Merry Xmas Everybody

Would Christmas be the same without this song?

1975 – Queen – Bohemian Rhapsody

1976 – Johnny Mathis – When a Child is Born

I only include this song in the list for the sheer comedy value of the first 60seconds

1979 – Pink Floyd – Another Brick in the Wall Part 2

1981 – The Human League – Don’t you want me baby

1983 – The Flying Pickets – Only You

Slightly haunting I think Although I the electro kid in me prefers the Original Yazoo version. May as well post it here for your viewing pleasure:

Definitely made more Christmassy’ thanks to The Office Christmas Special.

1984 – Band Aid – Do they know it’s Christmas?

1985 – Shakin Stevens – Merry Christmas Everyone

Loving his performance hear. Shake it 80’s style. It’s like watching your Dad Dance.

1987 – Pet Shop Boys – Always’ on my Mind
Now this is the year Kirsty McColl and the Pogues were beaten to the top – I mean how could they compete against this amazing Pet Shop Boys Cover. Elvis would have been very proud of this. And yet this song hasn’t dated – its still playable and hits you in the same way over and over again every time you come back to it. Pure class from the Pet Shop Boys.

Genius!

1990 – Cliff Richard – Mistletoe and Wine.
You know you love it!

1995 – Michael Jackson – Earth Song
Very fitting song given that the Earth is in a more sorry state now than it was when this was released. And thanks to China and same very lame world leaders – Copenhagen was a massive Failure!

RIP MJ

What followed Jackson was a pile of cack by the Spice Girls

2003 – Michael Andrews & Gary Jules – Mad World

After this – Christmas Number 1 became pointless – yes we got a another remade version of Band Aid but did we really need series of X-Factor led Simon Cowell Crap?

Anyway Merry Christmas Everyone – Except Mr Simon Cowell!

The best Christmas Movie - EVER EVER EVER!

The World Needs Drama

2009-11-18T07:54:00.001Z

A nice youtube video on why the "World Needs Drama". I reckon he should get his own series if Entourage ever ends.

Julian Casablancas - Out Of The Blue

2009-11-15T18:42:00.001Z

Track Number 1 from Julian Casablancas Album. And in my honest opinion I think this is the best track by a long way. That's no disrespect to the other tracks - but this track is awesome. A sing-a-long-extravaganzar! So much better than all that manufactured Simon Cowell shite out there!

Frontlines: The Warning

2009-10-21T23:39:00.006+01:00

Below is a documentry on the financial crisis we have and still are experiencing - it goes through the history of how we got there from simple OTC Derivatives and watching them as they got more and more complicated. Following how the Regulators tried in vain to keep pace with the world of derivatives as they quickly evolved.

Worth watching in its entireity

Scary how Greed became the norm.

Julian Casablancas - "River of Brakelights"

2009-10-20T09:29:00.001+01:00

This is Julian Casablancas's next Single - Interesting an eclectic is the best way to mention this track - loud and fast - enjoying the vocals mixed with the indie electronic chaos with some great tempo.

Unfortunatly the album isn't out yet! Its been delayed to:

PHRAZES FOR THE YOUNG will be released internationally on the following dates:

OCTOBER 30 – Australia, Austria, Germany, Switzerland

NOVEMBER 2 – Belgium, Czech Republic, Denmark, Finland, France, Hong Kong, Italy, Netherlands, New Zealand, Poland, Portugal, United Kingdom

NOVEMBER 3 – Canada, Spain, United States

NOVEMBER 4 – Brazil, Sweden

Not sure why the UK dosn't get it until November 2nd!

Look forward to more Sounds in the future.

The Banking Crisis how it is according to Max Keiser

2009-10-16T18:20:00.005+01:00

The Outspoken Max Keiser saying it how it is in this TV interview screened in the last 24hours.
Max Keiser comparing Goldman Sachs and the big banks to Terrorists - a highly amusing face off debate between Max Keiser and the Kid from Mad Comics all grown up.

The kid doesn't stand a chance

I urge you to keep watching to Part 2 - amusing financial entertainment.

The DOW should not be 10,000 until this economy has recovered and it is a long way off from recovery. Take note.

Official Che Trailer HD

2009-10-06T00:15:00.001+01:00

So I finally got round to watching CHE - Part 1 and Part 2.

Benecio Del Toro does a wonderful job in his betrayal of Ernesto "Che" Guevara. Soderbergh true to form just lets the wonderful cast just get on with it with his directing.

Part 1 was exceptional - Part 2 was very good just not as good as Part 1 however, when your telling the Story of his Cuban days in Part 1 and Bolivia days in Part 2 that is to be expected. Great Cinema - just shocked it took me so long to see this award winning film - go see if you haven't already done so!

Julian Casablancas - 11th Dimension

2009-09-21T08:35:00.011+01:00

There haven't been many albums in 2009 that i've been excited about. But one is due out in less than a month that looks to finally hit the spot. Julian Casablancas's debut album, "Phrazes for the Young" will be released in the UK on October 19th and in the US on October 20th.

It might not be The Strokes but from what I've heard of it already it certainly has sounds that are very Strokes like with some an awesome Electronic Battle Weapon'esque feel to it.

First Single 11th Dimension:

Not sure if you missed it earlier this year - But Julian colaborated with the Awesome "The Lonely Island" made a song together called BOOMBOX - well it makes me smile everytime I hear it - so here it is once again.

Nice video I thought - not the official video - but certainly an amazing effort.

"Electro Education before Destruction".

The Power of One!

2009-08-10T11:03:00.001+01:00

Kid with no limits starts a dance party - watch til the end

Bernanke: Why are we still listening to this guy?

2009-08-03T23:33:00.001+01:00

You know - I like Bernanke - but its very clear that he got it all very wrong. I mean, at the end of the day he was just an economist (I would know One of his books got me through University). But economists generally have theories its not an exact science, but the reality is - this guy got it very very badly wrong! Observe the Video.

Ready for the Next Credit Crunch?

2009-07-31T16:42:00.007+01:00

Commercial Real Estate Ticking Time Bomb.

Commercial property has been a very popular asset class over the last decade. Investors who were spooked by the equity market dot-com crash were encouraged to invest in commercial property. Investors were encouraged to speculate on a form of "carry trade"- borrow at historic low interest rates and lease the property to take advantage of high rental yields and capital growth (a return on their principle). Add to the mixer, globalisation and the ability to move money globally for very little cost; this strategy presented very attractive opportunities.

The last 18 months has seen cheap financing dry up and the global economic recession has driven up vacancy rates. The well publicised collapse of the residential property market has masked the time bomb that is the commercial property market. The commercial property market has many parallels to the residential property market, including the mass securitisation of property loans (CMBS). With rising delinquency rates, there is potential for the securitised CMBS market to collapse like the residential MBS market. In recent times, there has been chatter from commercial real estate investors and banks that we may have another round of large losses due to this. The potential for losses have been estimated to around $200-300 billion for US banks, and European banks are heavily exposed also. With soaring delinquency rates across Europe and Asia, the potential for this market to cause havoc world-wide remains very strong.

The collapse of the residential property market, and draw strong parallels with the commercial market. If economies suffer a prolonged period of contraction, and delinquency rates continue to rise, we may see panic in the CMBS markets. This will be a disastrous event, and could lead to another bout of strong credit contraction. With interest rates already at historic lows, there remains little in the central banks' armoury to deal with this.

Hints of a prolonged economic contraction will signal danger, and a collapse of the commercial property and CMBS markets may lead us into a period of economic depression- as a worst case scenario. Commercial property recovery takes many years, maybe decades (take the Japanese example- commercial property prices are still at 45% to their early 1990s peak).

This will send Equity Markets down past the March lows - unavoidable if a Depression comes about and with USA GDP down a further 1% in this last quarter its not long before Depression comes true (GDP contracting by more than 10%).

Evidence for this was sourced from FUTEX and other sensible comentators.

Does the above look good to you!?

Overbought would be an understatement

2009-07-28T09:07:00.008+01:00

As we all know we are currently in a Global recession. Unemployment is increasing at a staggering rate throughout the world at a staggering pace, this rate is only made worse as companies look to cut their operating costs to keep their shareholders happy. It seems in this day and age if a company is seen to be sacking, reducing staff costs and spending less with its suppliers then the shareholders who are generally pension funds, big banks and those private investors still in jobs are happy. What they don't seem to realise is this cost cutting is having a knock on effect to an already bad situation in the economy. With less people in work, fewer people are spending and those in work are certainly cutting back on their consumption due to the fear factor that it could be them up next to the chopping board. So this in turn has a multiplier effect which knocks onto the whole economy - shareholders may feel slightly more flush because in the short term a company has been seen to cut costs so its share price might rise but in the long term without its customers spending money on its general business this business and all businesses will suffer further. Effectively leading the so called "V" shaped recovery into at best a "W" shaped recovery but at worse a huge depression which was last seen in the 1920's.

The Federal Reserve, the Bank of England and all the other major world banks might think they have the tools to deal with the problems through Monetary Policy but the reality is as businesses cut back on their spending and begin to produce a lot less combined with the effect of governments devaluing every major currency huge inflationary pressure will be seen to be on the cards and with no end to the unemployment in sight worst case 1920's scenario's could be very likely. This in turn will be mirrored in share prices - causing a huge slump in share prices - probably breaching the March 2009 lows and heading lower.

Well that's my rant for the day - however - I thought I would draw your attention to an interesting note from Deutsche Bank yesterday:

Earnings
Make no mistake, this has been a very strong start to the US reporting season relative to EPS expectations seen as we entered reporting season. However we should put things in perspective. Q2 YoY growth was expected to be -11.3% on Jan 1st, -31.7% on April 1st and -35.5% on July 1st. With 184 companies having now reported the blended YoY growth rate stands at -31.0%, back to where expectations were when the quarter started in April and well below where expectations were at the start of the year. It would be interesting to know what the market reaction would have been on January 1st had people known the full extent of Q2's poor YoY earnings growth. YTD the S&P 500 is now up 8.42% with Stoxx600 +10.74%. Clearly the equity market is rightly looking at 2010 and the recovery, but it does seem that it is prepared to sweep a very bad 2009 under the carpet and naturally assume markets return to near normality in 2010. The table overleaf shows aggregated Q2 earnings so far in both the US and Europe.

End 'cruel' religious slaughter, say scientists

2009-06-22T13:53:00.011+01:00

End 'cruel' religious slaughter, say scientists

Beasts should be stunned before their throats are slit, Jews and Muslims are toldBy Martin Hickman, Consumer Affairs Correspondent at the Independent Newspaper

Monday, 22 June 2009

Meat Hygiene Service suggested 114 million animals were killed under halal and 2.1 million under kosher methods each year in Britain

Religious slaughter techniques practised by Jews and Muslims are cruel and should be ended, says a scientific assessment from the Government's animal welfare advisers.

The Farm Animal Welfare Council says that slitting the throats of the animals most commonly used for meat, chickens, without stunning, results in "significant pain and distress". The committee, which includes scientific, agricultural and veterinary experts, is calling for the Government to launch a debate with Muslim and Jewish communities to end the practice.

One Muslim organisation, the Halal Food Authority, already insists on the slaughterhouses it regulates stunning animals first on welfare grounds, as long as they are still alive when their throats are slit. But in other halal and almost all kosher slaughterhouses, animals have their throats slit without prior stunning which would render them insensible to the pain. Religious groups say that doing so would be against their interpretation of religious texts.

They are granted an exemption to the Welfare of Animals (Slaughter or Killing) Regulations 1995, which stipulates that creatures such as cows, goats and chickens be stunned first.

In a report into the slaughter of white meat, the Farm Animal Welfare Council (Fawc) said evidence suggested that chicken and turkeys were likely to be conscious for up to 20 seconds as blood seeped out of them. The animals are killed by a transverse incision across their neck, cutting skin, muscle, trachea, oesophagus, carotid arteries, jugular veins and major nerves.

"Such a large cut will inevitably trigger sensory input to pain centres in the brain," the council said. "Our conclusions ... are that such an injury would result in significant pain and distress ... before insensibility supervenes. Fawc is in agreement with the prevailing scientific consensus that slaughter without pre-stunning causes pain and distress. On the basis that this is avoidable and in the interests of welfare, Fawc concludes that all birds should be pre-stunned before slaughter."

While recognising the difficulties of reconciling scientific findings with matters of faith, it urged the Government to "continue to engage with religious communities" to make progress. In a 2003 report on red meat, Fawc called for ministers to repeal the religious groups' legal opt-out.

The Shechita Council, which oversees kosher meat, was contacted but did not supply a comment. Massood Khawaja, president of the Halal Food Authority, insisted that its animals were stunned, unlike those regulated by another group, the Halal Monitoring Committee. "The Koran says use your brain, ponder about things and that's what we are doing," he said. "It's a question of animal welfare."

The Government no longer keeps statistics on religious slaughter, but five years ago, the Meat Hygiene Service suggested 114 million animals were killed under halal and 2.1 million under kosher methods each year in Britain.

The Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs said it would not change its "long-standing policy of religious tolerance" by ending the opt-out. "And while the Government would prefer to see all animals stunned before slaughter, we will continue to ensure that required standards of animal welfare are effectively monitored and enforced in all slaughterhouses," it said in a statement.

Last year, Lord Rooker , a minister in the department, called for meat slaughtered without stunning to be labelled for the public's benefit, since some cuts were considered unacceptable to eat, and sold back into the food chain.

The Government no longer keeps statistics on religious slaughter, but five years ago the Meat Hygiene Service suggested 114 million were killed under halal and 2.1 million under kosher methods each year.

Last night, the vegetarian organisation Viva!, Tom Lane, said: “How many times does the Government's own advisory committe on animal welfare have to ask for a ban on slaughter without pre-stunning before action is taken? Viva! embraces multiculturlism and all religious faiths, but the suffering of these animals is so extreme that a line has to be drawn somewhere.”

The Chaser's WOE: 9/11 Poll, S2 E41

2009-06-15T02:27:00.001+01:00

Had to be shared - funny Chasers Clip

Scott Purves Punts Down the River Cam on a sunny day in Cambridge

2009-05-31T03:59:00.001+01:00

just a video of Scott

Dead Man Walking

2009-04-23T19:08:00.004+01:00

I wonder if any parliamentarian mutters the words “Dead Man Walking” every time they see Gordon Brown walking down the halls of Westminster! I’m guessing it was said many times yesterday as he walked in to the House of Commons ahead of Alistair Darlings very disappointing budget speech that cost everyone even more money.

The Bookies had put odds of 250/1 on the budget that Gordon Brown would kiss Darling after he had completed his Budget Speech – they were right – no kiss was witnessed, but then again I can’t really imagine Brown to be the kissing type. However, if I was a Bookie I would be able to offer odds of 250/1 that Brown would be Prime minister come the next parliament – the man thankfully is now officially Dead Man Walking! The only unfortunate thing about this – his execution probably won’t come until May 2010 – so we are stuck with this sour miscible old man who lies through his teeth again and again and keeps himself surrounded by politicians that President Mugabe could easily relate to if he were in UK politics (Jacqui Smith).

David Cameron once again looked like the leader in waiting when he gave his summary of Darlings Budget and Browns failed Government. If you didn’t catch it – watch it here:

Darling announced an abysmal excuse for a Green Policy in yesterday’s budget that you could scrap your car if it was 10years old or older and get £2000 contribution towards a new car. How can Labour claim to have any green credentials when it’s endorsing a throw away society once again? Cars need not be scrapped once they are 10 years old! With proper maintenance and care a car can last many decades – but Labour is so concerned about saving a French/German/Japanese car industry that it believes it is better to scrap old cars and get new cars back on the road massaging stimulus into the suffering foreign car industry! A shocking Brown/Darling initiative that couldn’t be further away from a Green Environmental move. Where was the spending on Green Initiatives – anything mentioned was feeble and pathetic!

Thank you Brown, you have flushed our Economy down the toilet. Dead Man Walking!

McCruelty

2009-04-23T02:09:00.007+01:00

There's a Global Recession taking place and many companies are suffering with reduced profits. However, because the world is populated by idiots there is one company that is bucking the trend and its cheap and so called cheerful food is selling like Hot Cakes (well in their case French Fries & Hamburgers)!

McDonalds continues to make abnormal profits in every region of the world!

All because people are either getting dumber or they feel they must downgrade their eating out experience in a recession and eat Happy Meals every time they go out! Why?

McDonalds is everything that is wrong about this world and here is today's Video of the Day illustrating just how Crap McDonalds is.

You have a Choice - Don't Eat there!

Let's Say no to Dumb Fat Fast Food & Hello to a No Cruelty World and a tanking share price!

Religion can take a walk

2009-04-17T00:59:00.008+01:00

I’ve often said the world would be a better place without Religion. And I still believe this. There would be no global fight against Terror as people would have no God to fight for. If they want to fight for land and women so be it – but at least they wouldn’t be fighting in the name of some Ideal that no one can prove exists.

The Frail and the Old are often comforted by the Idea of God, as God allows us the ability to believe there is an after life and that ones miserable existence in the hot barren desert is just preparation before being in Heaven surrounded by Virgin after Virgin. If there is such a place – I feel sorry for all those Virgins that have to commit themselves to some dodgy smelly sand dwelling Bearded Terrorist that probably has the Sexual Know How of a Blind Impotent Repressed School Boy. Could God really be so kind to the “Allah” shouting fools and so unkind to the ‘Virgins’? Will St Peter really greet us at the Pearly White Gates and refuse entry to us because we don’t tick the right box on the religion we followed! Face it – its Bull shit! I could write a thesis on this and many that know me will know that I sometimes go on for hours about all the evidence suggesting The Jew, The Muslim, The Christian, The Mormon and so on are talking out of their arses if they think they are right. All I know is you don’t know because I don’t know and this thing you call Faith is just you betting on the right path just in case something awaits you when the lights go out.

Religion Sucks & those that want to see an end to Terror need to realise this. A Great Doc/Film I saw recently made by Bill Maher called “Religous” (that’s how its spelt) – illustrates through Comedy and his fantastic style of reporting once again just how ridiculous religion is. Watch it if your Religious and watch it if your only a little religious and watch it if you can’t stand religion as it might make you realise your no longer in the minority any more.

9/10 - will make you laugh and laugh

Edward Gant’s Amazing Feats of Loneliness – Soho Theatre

2009-04-14T01:31:00.007+01:00

This Review was published on Totally Theatre's Website 2 weeks ago - here it is for reference as play has now left London.

Gather round Ladies and Gentlemen and behold one of the strangest but at the same time compelling shows to hit London Theatre Land since Queen Victoria ruled the old Empire.

Written by Anthony Neilson the Scottish playwright who in recent years has been commonly associated with the "in-yer-face theatre" theatrical movement. Edward Gant’s Amazing Feats of Loneliness is no exception to the rule – set in 1881 the play reconstructs Edward Gant’s traveling show for the final time to the unsuspecting Soho Audience.

Striding forth and presenting what hides behind the red curtain is “Edward Gant”, a Opium fuelled adventurer, explorer, fighter and collector of stories who aims to bring us a freak show spectacular from the realms of the 19th Century about the “Amazing Feats of Loneliness” with his troupe of 3 actors who travel the country and quite possibly the world as they explore Gants worldly mystical stories through freaky sometimes grotesque re-enactment in comical circus fuelled fashion to such a degree that it has a Muppet Show quality. Just wait for the pimples to make an appearance on stage (don’t ask – you simply have to see this to believe it).

Without interval and at about 1hour 25mins the play bravely switches from circus freak show that isn’t scared of using innuendo to something just as surreal but more serious when the actors encounter the “Phantom of the Dry” whom appears only when an actor forgets ones lines (all part of the play of course). Speaking to a friend after the play it could be said that this part of the story though vivid, could potentially come across as confusing. But if you can get past the confusion of the surreal Teddy Bears who want an imaginary cup of tea its hard not to sit up and mentally engage in this production as the actors themselves appear to also engage with the audience on their new journey of loneliness far more effectively than the previous two staged stories about a girl with pearl pimples and a man, heart broken, through losing his love after she is stung by a wasp.

Edward Gant played by Simon Kunz is everything you would imagine a Victorian travelling showman looking the part in Top Hat and Tails rounded off the perfect look with slick Phileas Fogg Moustache, the mystical mans performance comes across as engaging and polished and should be commended, however the hardest work comes together by Sam Cox who plays the old army boy Jack Dearlove while at the same time pulling off a truly comedic performance as an Italian Cassanova “Salvatore Avaricci” who is drawn to the art of acquiring as much as possible while seeking mysterious love. The rest of the cast consisting of Paul Barnhill and Emma Handy round off the rest of the case with flare and likability enabling the audience to care for their plights no matter how strange.

Edward Gant’s Amazing Feats of Loneliness will be enjoyed if you can catch it in its brief run at the Soho theatre, as long as your not offended by 19th century humour, exploding pimples and bloody brain surgery all of which wouldn’t seem out of place on an episode of Little Britain – but unlike Little Britain this is actually good with solid acting performances, a script that will make you sit up and think and a set design thanks to Tom Scutt that takes you back to 19th century weirdness with school boy day dream intrigue. A fine piece of theatre that experiments and does things differently from the rest, just don’t take anyone who might be squeamish.

Actors’ performance 4 stars
Script 4 stars
Set/stage design 4 stars

4 stars

By Alexander van Terheyden

Generation Kill

2009-04-04T03:42:00.003+01:00

Thought I should just alert you to a TV Mini Series of high standard. I tend to only watch Film and generally stay well clear of what's on TV although I do have my weakness for Neighbours (a sad addiction I've had most of my life). However, in Early 2009 I discovered Generation Kill. Its just a 8 part mini series but of a serious high grade standard in terms of TV entertainment. If only every show was like this - you would never leave the house (just as well there's a lot of crap on TV then).

FX-TV is showing repeats if you missed it first time round or you can buy the Generation Kill DVD or you can just illegally download it. Whatever you do - I urge you to watch it. Apologies this tip is so late in the day - should of brought it to your attention months ago!

Daniel Hannan MEP: The devalued Prime Minister of a devalued Government

2009-03-28T11:56:00.001Z

Conservative MEP says to Gordon Brown what we have all been thinking! Gordon Brown's Days are numbered! After the G20 meet many will be calling for his head if they have sense.

British Government Releases more UFO Files - but is it enough?

2009-03-22T19:30:00.012Z

The UK Government has once again released a trickle of files in regards to its so called UFO investigations.
Those that know me, will know, that I’ve always had a belief that there is more out there than most of us have been made fully aware of. And I’m also of the belief due to infinite investigations with various sources that our Governments (especially the US Government) knows more than it’s so far prepared to reveal. For example why does the US Government still not admit or at least put its hand on its heart and deny reports that the US Air force Base that can be found in the Nevada desert known to many as Area 51 is home to reverse engineering of Alien Technology or that it actually exists?

Funny how anytime anyone mentions the word “Alien” people cringe because its been associated with Red Neck Nut Jobs – however when respectable Astronauts like Buzz Aldrin & Dr Edgar Mitchell have publicly come out to reveal they’ve had close encounters and are fully aware that the US Government & NASA are covering things up to the world shouldn’t we take the subject a little bit more seriously rather than associating it with crack pots and Sci-Fi Geeks?

AREA 51 Documentary worth watching (there are 5 parts – this is part 1):

Check Out today’s BBC News for the March release of investigations:
BBC Website Link

I have to admit this Month’s release of information isn’t as impressive as previous months (the previous month had the MOD admitting they had fired upon UFOs in British Airspace) but nonetheless it does seem to be a step in the right direction and almost another step closer to preparing the human race for a hard hitting revelation that we are not alone – if they bombard us with enough information at a steady pace then a sudden revelation that others are out there won’t come as such a shock to the Zombie Masses. Even the pope admitted recently that it was acceptable to believe in Aliens - a huge and significant revelation from the Catholic Church http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24598508/ - are they trying to prepare their followers for something?

The Russians, French and a few other major Governments of the world have publicly come out and released files on the subject matter which they don’t fully understand – it was helpful when the Cold war ended and files in Moscow went walkabouts – people who had been exposed to secrets were able to sell secrets for money – well some interesting secrets came out (Google Russian UFO Files and you will find a lot of information) http://www.ufocasebook.com/russia1969.html.

So why does the US Government & the UK Government continue to hide all they know despite the fact that the UK government is dripping out a few files here and there? Well some would argue it’s because they know as much as you and I but I think we would really have to be kidding ourselves to believe this is the case. The logical reason would be if our Governments admitted to being in contact with other civilisations or in possession of crashed Alien Craft then it would have to release this information to the entire world – this would be the biggest truth since discovering the New World and realising the world wasn’t flat. And in releasing this information to the whole world you then have the problem of revealing to your enemies that you have technology or contact that they couldn’t even imagine or dream of. The sods law of the situation could be in the fact that all major governments could be in contact or aware of the phenomenon but each government chooses to hold its cards as close to its chest as possible. The reality though is only a few privileged nations have had significant contact or discoveries by having recovered wreckage from mishaps that could be written very nicely into a Hollywood movie script. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roswell_UFO_incident

Unidentified Flying Object is simply that an object that is flying through the air that can’t be identified. The truth is most sightings can easily be explained but the scary thing is our airspace is often being invaded by objects of various shapes and sizes that simply can’t be explained – if trained RAF Pilots and astronauts have seen craft that can’t be explained surely then as I said earlier we must take this seriously. I imagine they mean us no harm but shouldn’t we have the right to know what is entering our air space on a daily basis?

David Cameron has promised he will reveal all should he discover secrets once his government is elected in the next election http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7854018.stm- i’d like to think this is true but will he been given access to this information straight away should he become Primeminister. Many believe there are organisations in government that are above government to protect these secrets. Does Obama know all the secrets yet? Probably not – I would imagine its on a need to know basis. It’s also believe NASA knows more than most inside – several NASA tapes illustrate some amazing footage but also illustrate how NASA continues to hide important evidence from its own citizens who pay NASA taxes and the people of earth.

What I love about the above video is how the NASA Astronauts go silent on the channel the public can listen to as they switch to secure channel to obviously discuss all the UFO’s flying behind the Broken Teather. Video Shows how the Craft are of 2-3miles in size! How do you know the craft are at least 2-3miles in diameter? Well the Teather is at least 70-100miles away and stretches out in length of 30miles so when a craft goes behind the teather it's fairly easy to calculate how big these craft really are! Motherships maybe or space dust which is the official NASA explanation!

More footage:

UFO Being Fired upon from Earth – do we already have missile defence in place?

Don’t discount this subject matter like so many I know do. Look to the skies and look for the truth and some revealing discoveries will be made.

US Unemployment Claimants

2009-03-19T13:02:00.005Z

Those following the dire economic situation around the globe seem to have recently disconnected them selves from what every Claimant (Jobseeker) represents. Each Month for the seventh straight time, the United States Financial powers that be announce that 600,000+ more people are now looking for a job over the last month, the worst performance since 1982.

The number of people collecting U.S. jobless benefits swelled to a record 5.47 million, indicating employees, once fired, aren't finding other work as companies cut costs.

Yet the stock market shrugs and doesn’t recognise that each digit in these figures is a real person! There are over 5million in the USA claiming benefits and yet the US Stock Market thinks prices are low and now is a good opportunity to buy! Over half the companies listed on the DOW Jones 30 Index and the S&P 500 are overvalued – why would anyone be buying into the market at these levels?

The Financial institutions globally with their excessive risk taking have screwed the global economy over and yet many of the same flock are deciding the US stock market should be bought once again. In my opinion the market hasn’t seen the lows it deserves. Currently the S&P is at 800 and the DOW is at 7555 – these markets have rallied 20% off their recent lows in just fewer than 2 weeks – a phenomenal bear market – something which hasn’t been seen since the 1930’s. However, that is exactly what it is – a bear market rally – get ready for the market to factor in the large unemployment numbers and to resume the sell off until levels of fair value are reached.

Generation Fat

2009-03-16T11:56:00.005Z

I’ve seen a lot of the UK in the last month – from the Highlands of Scotland to the Rolling littered fields of Sothern England. And with this UK tour I have noticed something very worrying. So worrying in fact I can now completely understand why our hospitals are full too capacity and our productivity as workers is at an all time low. Everyone in the UK is FAT!

I’ve been privileged enough to be sheltered from Generation Fat by spending the majority of the last 10years in Central London Zone 1 – hanging out with the Fashionista’s and skinny Coked up Rock n Rolla’s of Shoreditch to the Skinny Catwalk Models that frequent the Members clubs in Mayfair. So I have to admit I rarely see that many fat people. Hard to look good in skinny jeans and tight ripped t-shirts if you’re carrying pies around your waist.

On my recent tour of the UK having chosen spending British Pounds rather than heading off overseas to get too few US Dollars or Euros I was confronted by Middle England and their domestic bliss of piling on the calories. How has an entire generation of people managed to let them selves go so badly? Has TV really become so good that these people never leave their sofas anymore? Do people cook for themselves anymore or is breakfast, lunch and dinner now solely confined to the fast food chains on every bland high street that now looks identical to the next?

Adding more tax to chocolate and confectionary may help but the reality is the general grazing culture of eating crap food and lots of it needs to change. If this doesn’t change the UK has a fine chance of overtaking the USA in the fat league tables – do we really want that crown?

Let me know your thoughts on this and whether you are happy to let Generation Fat take over.

Who was dumb enough to vote for Gordon Brown?

2009-03-10T01:39:00.007Z

Today I got a letter from Gordon Brown in regards to a Petition I had signed on the Number 10 Downing Street Website.

Granted, I didn’t make up the petition – but I signed it because the person who had created the petition meant well with their action to start the Petition.

“We the undersigned petition the Prime Minister to ask the Chinese Government to look into the barbaric treatment of animals for Fur.”

Details of Petition:

“Recently I come across a link revealing the horrific treatment to animals for there fur. The terrified animals were battered to death some were still alive & skinned left living for up to 10 minutes. This video haunts me how can the Chinese people do such horrific things. Please sign in a bid to try & get it stopped.”

Yes lamely worded – but it’s hard not to sign up to this. Check out the new video from PETA which features Ricky Gervais & Pink Highlighting the impact of being skinned alive on Crocodiles and Rabbits!

Nicely highlighted by Gervais I think - certainly more effort than any politician as of late.

Want to see what lovely Gordon Brown’s Response was?

“We share the view that fur farming is unacceptable. That is why we have banned this practice in the UK.
Farming any animal solely or primarily for its fur was banned in England and Wales by the Fur Farming (Prohibition) Act 2000, in Scotland by the Fur Farming (Prohibition) (Scotland) Act 2002 and in Northern Ireland by the Fur Farming (Prohibition) (Northern Ireland) Order 2002. There are no longer any registered fur farmers operating in the UK.

Unfortunately there is little we can do to prevent other countries from farming animals for their fur. While we cannot intervene directly in Chinese legislation however, we have taken every opportunity to put across the views of the UK government and public opinion. We continue to work closely with other countries to promote the conservation of the world’s wildlife through our membership of international agreements such as the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species of Wild Fauna and Flora (CITES)."

What a TWAT! Brown or the Labour Government has never publicly complained to the Chinese about the fur trade or the mistreatment of animals – not once! The guy isn’t really addressing the issue here – but then again if he did address the issue – who would buy all our government bonds? Our Economy would fall through the floor in the debt it is drowning in if the Chinese weren’t buying up our debt. So in 2009 our dire economy gets in the way of Animal Rights - Brown knows he would be shooting himself in the foot once again if he made comments on Chinese torture of animals and trade in fur. A coward – yes! A man who has had 12 years managing our economy who has now flushed the UK down the toilet – YES!

But you know there are some people in the UK who still don’t know how vain this one eyed power hungry gormless cock really is because Brown and his PR imbeciles have successfully flushed £188 million down the toilet because in 2008 the Labour Government spent that much on television advertising telling us what to do and how great they are! But people can’t buy his crap for much longer surely!

If you saw tonight’s Dispatches on Channel 4 you would have been shocked at how much money has been wasted by the incompetent Labour Government. Makes any sane person want to declare war on this government at how they have squandered this nations cash with very little to show for it apart from rising violence, social unrest and the worst economy that has been seen in since plague afflicted old Blighty!

“Gordon Brown!” I am counting down the days when you get booted out and kicked hard up the Colon by the British Public so hard it hurts like there is no tomorrow. The clock is ticking and I like so many others are counting down the minutes – so prepare for our wrath!

Support the Sea Shepherd Stop the Japanese Death Boats

2009-02-27T00:19:00.007Z

Those that have spent much time with me will know of my rants against those that are committed to Whaling, the fur Trade & general parasitic killing of every species on this planet.

I've mentioned the Sea Shepherd many times before - but I stumbled upon a show that was recently on Animal Planet. Whale Wars follows the Sea Shepherd as it takes a stand against the Japanese.

If you're feeling charitable please donate to the warriors of the sea as unlike most people on this planet they give a shit and will never back down from a fight when it comes to saving the planets most endangered species.

More details can be found at: http://www.seashepherd.org/

I hope before the decade is out the seas killers get what they deserve and all whaling, dolphin and shark slaughter is made illegal.

On the Waterfront

2009-02-24T16:14:00.006Z

Last week I went to see On The Waterfront at the Theatre Royal in London's West End -Below is the review I added to the www.totallytheatre.com

Enjoy!

15 February 2009

by Alexander Van Terheyden
Rating 4 stars

This Month sees Steven Berkoff bring his rendition of Budd Schulberg's 8 Oscar winning "On the Waterfront" to London Theatre land with style & glory presenting the treasure chest to Theatre Goers where Treasure Island at the Theatre Royal failed. Whereby Treasure Island ending its run prematurely may have gone in search for the treasure in audience hearts "On the Waterfront" is a treasure chest to behold.

On the waterfront follows the plight of retired boxer 'Slugger' "I could've been a contender" Terry Malloy, who was originally brought to life by Oscar winning Hollywood legend Marlon Brando. Simon Merrells has the daunting but prestigious task of taking on and bringing this role to the slanted shadowy stage that leans intimately into the audience at the Theatre Royal.

Terry Malloy in doing ‘a favour' for the Boss ‘Johnny Friendly' (Steven Berkoff) suddenly finds himself in part of the jigsaw that led to the murder of Joey Doyle (Alex McSweeney). Ridden with guilt and angst about life, he is slowly enlightened by new found love interest Edie Doyle (Bryony Afferson) and with help from the man of the cloth Father Barry (Vincenzo Nicoli) who is new to the world of the Waterfront, who proceeds to lean on him and those around him who are less fortunate Malloy's priorities soon take a change of direction when the Crime Investigation team call him up for questioning.

Over the course of 2 hours and 15 minutes including a 20 minute interval we journey with Malloy as he battles with his conscience and finds the courage to denounce the Mob's overbearing threatening control of the New York Longshoremen's Mob Union to the cops. Berkoff directs and performs with the passion you have come to expect from all his past plays and performances - bringing his own take on the 1954 classic originally directed by the late and great Elia Kazan who had previously brought "A Streetcar named Desire" (1951). A colourful Hollywood past that contained one major blemish - he became a friendly witness in the late 40's in the House Un-American Activities Committee when Senator John McCarthy began investigating the Hollywood film industry in what was effectively a with-hunt for Communists. The original film had been seen by many as a way for its creators' (Elia Kazan & Schulberg) justification on ratting on friends and colleagues.

Many have claimed Kazan & Schulberg made "On the Waterfront" as a way to justify, to the world, what they did back when McCarthy was on his crazy witch-hunt for communists, something not last seen since the days when Salem was hunting for real witches. Coincidently both Kazan & Schulberg worked closely with Arthur Miller on Death of Salesman (1951). Miller only one year before Schulberg brought us "On the Waterfront" had premiered on Broadway "The Crucible" inspired by the McCarthy hearings, the only difference between the Miller & the Waterfront men - Miller refused to testify, unfortunately both Kazan and Schulberg were called up as friendly witnesses who in turn came to "Rat out" ex comrades who influenced their early communist thinking - as rewards - they were both allowed to keep working in Hollywood.

Ignoring the politics and history of this wonderful script Berkoff through symbolic, poetic metaphors pushed upon us by himself on stage and his magnetic ensemble of a cast successfully brings New York's Grittiness and harshness of working on the cold docks with class and style. The use of slow motion is used with extraordinary effect combined with sound effects from the Zombie like workers that capture the harsh times of early 20th Century Unions run by the Mob - you either inside secure in your job but unable to protest injustice or your outside with no job and if you protest you could end up suffering a nasty accident.

It would be unfair to overlook any of the cast they all shine - especially the men who bring comedy and a shift to the atmosphere by playing pigeons on the roof. A lot of work has gone in to body movement and facial expressions and this comes across well. All performers can go home proud knowing they are part of West End Production that is brave enough to take risk and not tow the usual line of musical direness that seems to have overrun London in recent years.

Simon Merrell though someone who has obviously been part of the industry for some time "Past 35" we are constantly reminded in the production it is a safe bet to tip him for future stardom - how can he fail when he has the qualities of Brando and similarities to Daniel Craig that are uncanny.

Unfortunately this production isn't without it's faults - the stage though neat and tidy as it slants towards the audience comes across as bland without adventure with its set design - could ships, water and inner city buildings not play a part as well as the statue of liberty? Impressive backdrop but it grows tired after the interval. Other than some annoyance about the highly original ending this production is one of the best plays I have seen in London in many years. A Contender for awards over the other bums in the city!

Incompetent Lazy Britain

2009-02-04T19:51:00.007Z

As my Grandmother celebrated her 90th Birthday today (Happy Birthday Nana!), I was reminded of how she was born in an era of Great accomplishment and optimism. The Germans had just been defeated by the Allies for what wouldn’t be the first time in the 20th Century. The Day after My Grandmother was born Charlie Chaplin helped launch United Artists – responsible for such films like 12 Angry Men & Some Like it Hot! Point vaguely proved that back then things were getting done and its fair say there was optimism and people certainly weren’t worried about a little bit of snow on the roads!

I found myself driving through London’s streets on Monday morning at 6.30am – yes the snow was deeper by London standards but in a two wheel drive Mini it wasn’t impossible to navigate as long as you drove slowly and safely. I managed to drive to Stansted Airport to discover over half the flights that day had been cancelled – so a new flight was arranged and booked for 8pm later that day in the hope Cecilie could get back home. Well when everybody was busy skiving off work and claiming it was impossible to get to work I managed to drive from London to Stansted then to Cambridge then later up the hills in the villages where villagers were claiming conditions were too dire to venture to work, whereby I later then went back to Stansted Airport – where the roads were clear of traffic all because you guessed it Joe Boggs’ and The Jones’ next door had all deemed Monday a day off.

Now normally people having a day off doesn’t concern me as it doesn’t effect me – but the reality is the British Economy probably lost hundreds of Millions in earnings yesterday this is despite times being hard because we are now in recession (see the last article - ). But it’s not the loss of The UK’s GDP that concerns me – because will I ever see any of the state pension – probably not! But I did have an operation booked at Addenbrookes Hospital on Thursday (tomorrow) to have my Tonsils removed (finally). And yet due to all the schools being shut these last few days because the teachers & head teachers are either too lazy to go to school or because 8 weeks holiday in the summer isn’t long enough! Thus with no complaints from the children (I wouldn’t complain if I was a child) they stay at home labelled pansies because we all fear for their “Health & Safety” forcing parents to stay at home, off from work if they can’t get any child care or just giving them an excuse to take a day off because everyone else is off thus destroying Operating theatres timetables out the window and thus causing my Operation to be cancelled as of lunchtime today!!!

“BASTARDS!”

Yes – I’m turning into a grumpy old man – but the reality is I’ve been waiting for months now to get this operation (and yes fool me for cancelling my private medical insurance months before I needed this operation).

Why are Schools closed for days on end because of a few inches of snow? Even if we had experienced 10 feet of snow should the Schools be closed? If Children & teachers can get to work (which I believe they can given the amount of driving I did on Monday) – why stay off work?

Why am I signalling out the Schools when they don’t concern me because I’m no longer a School Kid or a parent? Well the parents of these precious children have to stay at home if the kids aren’t at school – completely disrupting the mechanics or the economy – flights get cancelled and operations get cancelled all because certain segments of society are either too worried about bloody health and safety or too bloody lazy to go to work! Snow does not give you the right to take the day off!

The snow we experienced this week pales in comparison to the snow the Scandinavians’ experience every winter and yet they manage to get to work – is it any wonder why our GDP per head of roughly $35k pales in comparison to Norway’s $53k! And yet the Norwegians’ don’t have the benefit of an old Empire and certainly have a lot less people (so effectively it doesn’t have the potential for as much scientific breakthrough) we share the same Oil reserves in the North Sea – and yet because they have been wise with North Sea Oil investment and we have done nothing but squander and spend, our country is fast going broke and Norway despite all the snow is becoming richer by the day – thanks to wise spending by its government. And yet Norway educates and looks after its people while the UK puts up with scroungers and lets those who battled the Germans die in the homes because they can’t afford to heat their homes. Well Done Lazy Britain!

External Source Below: CIA World Fact Book & Wikipedia.

GDP dollar estimates here are derived from purchasing power parity (PPP) calculations. Such calculations are prepared by various organizations, including the International Monetary Fund and the World Bank. As estimates and assumptions have to be made, the results produced by different organizations for the same country tend to differ, sometimes substantially. PPP figures are estimates rather than hard facts, and should be used with caution.

United Kingdom (Rank 18) - 35,634 est
Norway (Rank 3)- 53,152 est

Only Luxembourg & Qatar beat Norway on GDP

Welcome to the recession

2009-01-23T13:45:00.007Z

Is it any surprise that GDP dropped more than expected? Gross domestic product fell by 1.5% in the last three months of 2008 after a 0.6% drop in the previous quarter. This means the UK is finally in recession – although we have known this for far longer than it seems the government has known it.

GBP/USD touched 1.35 today! The FTSE is Below 4000 & the Dow is Below 8000 – the worlds economy seems to be going down the financial toilet. But more importantly the UK thanks to Prime Minister Gordon Brown’s actions as Chancellor & PM since 1997 has well and truly strangled this country and it’s in a worse state than many would of thought possible.

The chances of coming out of recession at a quicker pace than any of the other economies on this globe are pretty slim (hence the reason Sterling is now 1.35 against the Dollar – Traders are betting against Brown). Sterling at these levels may indeed help our exports but when an economy has no manufacturing of any importance to talk of there isn’t much to export to the rest of the world. The UK has survived these last 10years+ on high street spending by the masses – but the UK high street is now dominated by the generic institutions that you find on every generic high street up and down the country, there isn’t much an incentive to save it – the British consumer has no reason to feel loyal other than the fact they may work there or they have friends that work at x y and z.

There are very few new businesses these days in the UK that aren’t service based – yeah sure – everyone is setting up a consultancy business these days but how many people do you know have set up a business in the last 10years that are actually making something that they could export overseas? I bet you can count those people on your facebook friend list on one hand – the rest of us are dependent on working for the big financial, corporate and global institutions.

So where have all the entrepreneurs gone?

Are we surprised – we’re all pushed into going to University these days. That’s great isn’t it? Well it would be if we could take what we learnt at University and put it into practice and work for ourselves – but unfortunately the average student now comes out of University with a debt of over £20,000 (if their lucky – as it’s likely to be a lot more than this) – hard to start a new business when you are already up to your neck in debt from day 1. How can anyone possibly rent out commercial premises and start their own business with ease? The British Labour Government likes to strangle anyone’s chances in doing this – they will charge you a fortune in business rates for the priviledge of being in this country – is it any wonder the landscape is only dominated by big firms that made it years ago.

Gordon Brown will continue to preach that he is doing all he can for the economy – but the reality is this disaster of a man has borrowed up to the tilt and is now probably sending us into Depression rather than recovery. What a cock!

The Vile Winter Trend

2009-01-12T16:05:00.008Z

You only have to stroll round the shopping districts of London to notice an alarming trend that seems to have engulfed the fashion victims of London. This trend is more noticeable the more upscale the neighbourhood you tour – proving once again Money can’t buy you class! The winter trend can be seen on the Kensington ladies as the temperature remains cold, the Essex Wives, the Russian pin ups and the generally clueless women of Europe. Every time, I see this fashion Faux Pas, my stomach winces and I honestly feel like vomiting there and then. Another course of action is to accost the Fashion Victim and fire of a tirade of intelligent abuse – this action has been taken many times in the last couple of months and each time I’m glared at by their blinged up embarrassed Husband or the women turn away acting clueless and innocent about the mistake they are making. So what fashion mistake am I referring to? FUR! FUR! FUR! Animals farmed and often skinned alive so that selfish fashion victims can feel wealthy and warm at the same time! Why is Fur coming back into fashion?

Why – because people don’t care anymore! Surely this can’t be the case?

People are recycling more these days and pledging they care about the environment yet when it comes to the suffering of Animals, these Fur wearing Monsters don’t seem to care.

Back in the 80’s there were huge campaigns to stop people buying fur – models were claiming to boycott the trade and the who’s who of the celebrity world would stand up and fight against the fur trade persuading the dumb masses not to buy or wear fur. But that seems to have completely changed in recent years – every clueless celebrity out there that enjoys the bling seems to be wearing a fur coat!

Here are a few examples:

- 50 Cent – Is it really that Pimping Manly to wear all those little animals?

- Invanka Trump – Donald’s Daughter as clueless as ever from the 50-Cent School of Fashion mistakes!

- Jennifer Lopez – the Jacket may be tasteful from a distance but is that blood in the critters mouth really that tasteful as it feels the last few seconds of its life drain from its body - all for its precious pelt so Jenny from the Block can look good?

- Lindsay Lohan – Crap Actress with even crapper Fashion taste – oh dear!

- Madonna – Maybe the divorce from Guy Ritchie is affecting her ethical taste – has it now gone out the window?

- The Olsen Twins – Double trouble when it comes to fur – boycott their dire films if you have any sense.

It’s my belief that the increased wealth that has come out of Russia in the last 10years has helped contribute to this fashion trend – The Russians have always been big advocates of fur – can you blame them – Its cold over there most of the year round and before Communism fell they hadn’t experienced the technological progress that can be found in synthetic warmer wears such as Gortex & neither had they been exposed to the ethical education that we in the west had been exposed to.

Fur is simply wrong – continuous education should have been taking place in recent years highlighting the plight and suffering that is inflicted on animals all because of the fur trade, the ever intelligent fur industry should not have been allowed to claw back its wealth from the Russians & the Shallow Celebrities that inflict our airwaves.

Not convinced fur might not be cruel? Observe these films on the harvesting of fur (I warn you these films are graphic):

The majority of Fur these days comes from China – Why? Because, life in China is cheap and there is no regulation – If you believe you know where that French designer sourced his fur for your precious fur coat – you really don’t! It’s sold on mass to a general market.

Still happy about the fur coat walking past you in the street?

This one exhibits a Fat American Scumbag harvesting Chinchilla Fur.

PETA investigators on a fur farm in Midland, Michigan, saw chinchillas who were being electrocuted, causing painful seizures to the animals' hearts, and having their necks snapped while fully conscious. The reason they are not cut – Chinchilla fur is only of any worth to the designers as long as there are no markings on the fur.

There are hundreds of sickening videos to be found on YOUTUBE and the rest of the internet in regards to the fur trade. Do we need to pull out the cans of Red Paint once again?
Only Cavemen were fur – so why do we need to take a backward step in the 21st Century?

What PETA are doing to take a stand:

And lastly a song to reflect on where your Fox fur jacket comes from:

The Jungle Book @ The Bloomsbury Theatre

2008-12-11T12:40:00.006Z

This Review can be found on the Totally Theatre Website.

Well here it is just for you blog readers:

11 December 2008
by Alexander van Terheyden
Rating - 3stars

Back to all reviews

The Bloomsbury Theatre these days seems more the venue of choice for stand up comedians like Ricky Gervais but the comic geniuses are taking a break from it all for the Holiday Period and right up until January 24th the Birmingham Stage Company is putting on a rendition of the old classic ‘The Jungle Book’ originally written back in 1894. The Jungle Book is not a stranger to adaptations, having previously been adapted for Film, Animated Film, Television and Comic Books as well as various stage renditions over the years – but does the Birmingham Stage Company have the necessities to make their rendition shine in London?

It is clear to see that when you pick up the Programme in the foyer that the Jungle Book is clearly aimed at the kids. The programme had ‘dot to dot’, ‘Crosswords’, Jungle Book animal facts and a variety of other puzzles littering the child friendly programme. The theatre is full of children, mums, dads and School Teachers so I tried my best to approach this performance of the Jungle Book from a child like perspective.

The first thing you need to be aware of – this is not Walt Disney’s Jungle Book you won’t get Baloo singing “Bear Necessities” and you won’t have the Monkeys singing “I want to be like you!” hence it is very unlikely you will be singing along to the songs on offer. However, give the songs a chance and I’m sure any kids you have with you will be clapping along to the songs with pantomime enthusiasm. Although I couldn’t help but feel that this was Kipling’s story mixed up with Andrew Lloyd Webber influenced songs spliced in with early morning Children’s Television – great if your under 10 not so great if happy feet school boy hip isn’t your cup of tea.

This isn’t the west end or a Musical Production in Vegas so your not going to be blown away by hydraulic sets and animatronics trying to persuade you your in the Indian Jungle but you do get a clean, well put together steamy jungle set that comes complete with a variety of jungle plants and jungle vines. The set slowly evolves as the story progresses beginning with dense jungle to sacred rocks where the pack of Wolves live, ancient ruins now inhabited by the Monkeys and a quaint Indian Village that appears to be on the edge of the Jungle.

All the characters that you will remember from the Jungle Book are here and each and every one of them is pulled off by the enthusiastic cast. There is some good comical chemistry seen between Baloo (Matthew Weyland) & Bagheeera (Declan Wilson) adding some needed giggles between songs but I couldn’t help but think while Mowgli (Steven Castelaz) is played with enthusiasm surely a boy that grew up in the harshness of the Jungle should be a little less camp, especially when you consider he runs with Wolves.

Take the young kids in your family and take them for the entertainment that they will enjoy – just don’t expect to get anything out of it for yourself – remember Christmas is for giving and this is one of those times you will have to give your time to your kids and not yourself. You can see Hamlet next week!

Oslo – Norway – Land of Munch, Blondes & Expense.

2008-10-31T03:40:00.004Z

So, I found myself in Oslo for a Long weekend with the Boy Wonder Purves – we had both had birthday’s so what better way than to treat ourselves than by booking incredibly cheap flights to Oslo whereby we only paid the airport taxes courtesy of Ryanair. Well at least we thought we were flying to Oslo – it turns out Ryanair does its usual ‘piss take’ and advertises an Airport as one city despite being a farm a good 2 hours away from Oslo. Alas it didn’t matter too much as we set off early on a Thursday from Stansted and had arranged for a flight back late on Sunday – thus giving ourselves ample time to get to and from Torp Airport (not Oslo).

Upon arriving in Oslo we settled into our luxury accommodation slap bang in the heart of Oslo surrounded by interesting neighbourhood bars offering a variety of experiences. Some of which I will let you use your own imaginations when I say we found ourselves in one bar whereby you wouldn’t know you were in the land of the Viking but instead the land of the African – upsetting for them when two white boys stroll in and change the juke box to the only non Hip Hop song in the house – but I think they appreciated the vibe of The Doors.

Now, I’d heard a lot of rumours from various friends and acquaintances who along the road over the years had said Oslo “is bloody expensive” – it can’t be that expensive I thought – “I live in Central London and I used to buy beer in Singapore after a days work!” Well, how right they were and how wrong I was! If ever there was a case for exchange rates being out of sync it is here. The Pound (GBP) currently trades at roughly 10 Norwegian Kronas – Oslo is going to remain expensive even when the Kroner halves in value and falls to 20 to the GBP. Why Oslo is so expensive; I have no idea as I had heard it was just alcohol that was expensive (your average 0.4litre Beer costs about £7 – that’s less than a pint) due to taxation on alcohol but it’s the food that throws you as well – something so basic like a chocolate bar costs £2-£3 and a very basic main course in a substandard restaurant you’re looking at £40+. Maybe Norwegians are all multi millionaires but even these millionaires must occasionally cringe when they have to hand over a small fortune just to have a night out. Nonetheless, the thought of handing over a small fortune didn’t deter us from seeking out the delights of the city of Oslo.

When in Norway and especially Oslo what better place to take in the artist Edvard Munch - Symbolist painter, printmaker, and an important forerunner of the expressionistic art movement. Munch has his own gallery dedicated to him in Oslo but his finest and most famous paintings can be seen at the National Gallery which in rare form for anything Norwegian is free entry! I got to see the Painted version of The Scream depicting an agonised figure against a blood red sky. The landscape in the background is Oslo fjord, viewed from the hill of Ekeberg, in Oslo (then Kristiania), Norway. The Scream is one of the pieces in a series titled The Frieze of Life, in which Munch explored the themes of life, love, fear, death, and melancholy. The Scream has been the target of several high-profile art thefts. In 1994, the version in the National Gallery was stolen. It was recovered several months later. In 2004, The Scream and Madonna were stolen from the Munch Museum. Both paintings were recovered in 2006. They had sustained some damage and went back on display in May 2008, after undergoing restoration. Hence for Scott and I it was an absolute pleasure to take in both The Scream & The Madonna while in Oslo.

Scandinavia famous for its Viking past and blonde bombshells, this doesn’t get completely undone when in Oslo. Though the Vikings may have disappeared (apparently Norwegian men are very timid according to the Norwegian women we met) the blonde bombshells certainly haven’t disappeared – everywhere you look are the classic looking Blonde Girls with the odd Brunette just to spice things up – you can almost comprehend how Norwegians put up with the expense of life when they have so much natural beauty. Which brings me on nicely to the surrounding Norwegian countryside – Fjords aplenty – you can understand why they’re so popular with the over 60’s on their cruise ships.

Go to Oslo at least once – in actual fact I aim to go back again – but I’m waiting for that mass devaluation of their currency before I hit the town again – it happened to Iceland and Denmark recently so it could happen here – but then again a impossibility for a nation that has invested its wealth with such skill and diversity.

Is America finally going to wake up from their state of ignorance?

2008-10-17T18:12:00.007+01:00

The United States of America – Land of the Free! The Most powerful Nation on the planet! Home of the Almighty Dollar! Home of the Brave!

Statements that I as a European have heard many times over the years – I once believed them when I was a kid in the 80’s – of course I did I was blown away by the Stars and Stripes blazed over Harley Davidson’s, Rocky Balboa (yes I know he isn’t real), the birth place and home of the greatest guitarist that ever lived – Jimi Hendrix. Everything just seemed bigger and better when you were a kid in the 80’s it was somehow the land of opportunity and the place everyone wanted to be.

Wow – How things have changed! Yes America is home to some truly wonderful people and yes some of the smartest people in the world live in America and it is the home of The Strokes – so in my book it’s still a great place. But – Damn! When will the large proportion of the States stop being so bloody ignorant? I could probably write a thesis on this ignorance (but I won’t) – be it the ignorance for not knowing where other countries are on a map of the world are to the ignorance of believing they are the be all and end all of the worlds’ stage. We are all on this planet as one species – let’s try and keep equality without oppression.

Anyway – my rant here is about the US Election. I’m getting more and more certain with each day that ticks by that Barack Obama is going to win the Election – if this happens he will certainly be the best President the USA has had in my lifetime if not potentially in US history – ok JFK was up there.

My fear – we have another Oliver Stone JFK situation! I can’t help but think there are a lot of dangerous fanatical Americans out here that seem to think because Obama once lived in Indonesia and isn’t white he must be a terrorist. Why they think this is beyond me? Maybe it’s media brainwashing or endless rallies by the 'Bit Bull' Palin but where they get this information from is beyond me! Obama gives a damn about social issues, he seems to want to put people first and he wants to change the state of the most powerful nation for the better. I hope he is all these things personally and I hope he has what it takes to make things better for the people of America and for the people of the Earth.

Here is an example of some of the people holding America back:

Depressing isn’t it!

Want some more – here you go:

Oh dear oh dear – McCain isn’t as bad as Bush – but do we really want another president whose supporters are like those above?

Make the right choice in November – Vote Obama if you have the right to vote.

Oh – just in case you didn’t believe me about the Geography. Watch this link:
Although I will stress again that some Americans are very well educated – these ones obviously aren’t!

Renting out ones place.....

2008-10-15T21:31:00.006+01:00

I had forgotten until recently how much hassle it is being a land lord. I’m in the process of letting out my place on City Road in Hoxton – typical I decide to let it out just as the credit crunch impacts stock market volatility causing everyone to fear for their jobs and their future. I had originally planed to let it out on the open market in the run up to September when I might get lucky and get some rich student types or grads started out on their new careers moving in. Alas I decided to go for the stupid option of agreeing to rent my place to a local business man who owns the Bar downstairs. Big Mistake!

Why I decided to agree to rent to this man is beyond me. This is the same man that I’d already had a confrontation with in the Hackney Council Chamber when I went up against him and his lawyer to state my case on why his bar shouldn’t be granted a late license. Fortunately I won the case – unfortunately I went travelling last year and while I was away he saw his opportunity to strike – applying for an application again. This time as I wasn’t there to state my case and in typical fashion his late license was granted by the useless powers that be at Hackney council.

Now, I’m a big fan of late licenses – it allows you to have a few drinks at a later hour and stay out that little bit later should you desire – however this is a case of “not in my back yard!”. But, fair is fair – he should be allowed to trade as long as he doesn’t disturb anyone – unfortunately his bar has turned from a tacky wine bar concept to a Turkish Bar and now more recently a bar that plays host to underage undesirables “oh but they have I.D and they are over 18!” - “yeah right!” – Though it shouldn’t matter anyway given that his license states over 21’s only – clearly he doesn’t care!

So despite this bar being filled with undesirables on certain days of the week – that’s ok because I don’t have to go in there – right? Wrong! The number of times I’ve had to push my way past the bouncer so I could get down into the bar to tell the manager (my possible future tenant) to turn the music down – as the music can be felt vibrating through the building! Now, I’ve asked him to put a restrictor on the amplifier – he didn’t understand the concept of this one – so with the help of my neighbours we facilitated a restrictor on the amplifier meaning he could play his music loud but only to a point where it doesn’t disturb anyone else (and trust me – it was still very loud) – however, within one week – this hand made restrictor had been thrown away and the idea of controlling the noise had been thrown out the window.

Now you would think I could get the council involved to shut him down, but I do not want to shut anyone down and foolishly I told him that I was moving out so he requested to rent it. In haste I said – “Done – yours for £400 a week” – all very well I thought – I had a tenant without the need of going through an agent. Wrong again! My common sense came back to me and I figured I needed to guarantee this guy was going to pay his rent – he had already been very unreasonable and confrontational in the past and his business thanks to me had already been shut for at least 8 months previously because he couldn’t get the desired license.

Ok – so I go to an estate agent who has previously rented out another place for me and inform him that I have a tenant lined up. For a small fee he could arrange for me a reference check that would enable me to get guaranteed rent via insurance in case of default. In a fashion that I should have predicted this for some reason upsets the bar manager because I’m now getting a lettings agent involved in the business deal between us, thus he believes I’m costing him extra money! However, his main gripe that seems to really upset him that he has to fill out a double sided piece of paper enabling a credit agency to verify he won’t default – nothing to complicated, you would think!

Well 3 weeks go by and no reference comes in from this chap. I go to investigate! Apparently the form is too complicated and his ability to read and write isn’t what you would expect – nice! Ok – Alarm bells start ringing – finally you would think. But foolishly I let it drag on past September (the boom period of London Lettings apparently) and now I’m back to letting out my place on the open market – unfortunately I’m now going to have to pay the lettings arrangement fee’s. Annoying but you live and learn!

Anyone fancy a 2 bed/2 bathroom flat in Shoreditch right by the tube? DOH!

The Top 10 80’s shows – says me!

2008-10-09T02:10:00.008+01:00

Having previously reflected on the Son of Rambow I started thinking about 80’s television. Now, is it just me or was kids TV better back then? I feel sorry for children growing up in the 21st century – what do they have now? Yes they have multiple channels and probably at least 40 channels dedicated to Kids programming but it is because of this complete dilution that the shows aren’t as good as they used to be. Now, if you would like to prove me wrong please be my guest – however, I would like to introduce you to the Top 10 shows of the 1980’s (the decade of my youth) - this list includes both cartoons and normal television.

Transformers (1984 – 1992)

Without a doubt – if there was no Transformers in the 1980’s I believe a lot of us would have been a lot worse off – this was sheer joy when you’re 5 years old and to be honest it still is!

The A-Team (1983 – 1987)

I pity the Fool that didn’t enjoy the A-Team – this was Saturday Afternoon on a rainy day at its best, back in the 80’s!
“In 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The A-Team.”

Airwolf (1984 – 1987)

Was I the only one that thought this was great? The only reason I ask – no one else seems to talk of it as fondly as I do other than myself in my circle of friends! Personally there are some days I would say this might be better than the A-Team – but fortunately back in those days this was on before the A-Team – making for some great day time viewing. How cool was Stringfellow Hawk and how cool was the sound Airwolf made at the beginning of the show!?! That’s a rhetorical question!

The Wonder Years (1988 – 1993)

Suddenly you don’t feel weird anymore because Kevin Arnold also has a voice in his head! Wonderful show – this genre hasn’t been beaten since. Remember the last speech from the last episode? NO! Well here it is:
“Growing up happens in a heartbeat. One day you're in diapers, the next day you're gone. But the memories of childhood stay with you for the long haul. I remember a place, a town, a house, like a lot of houses. A yard like a lot of other yards. On a street like a lot of other streets. And the thing is, after all these years, I still look back...with wonder.”

MacGyver (1985 – 1992)

How cool was this guy – he was a spy who would get into dangerous situations time after time and yet would always find a genius way to get out of that situation – priceless! Probably the only hero in the 80’s who actively used Brain over Brawn – inspirational.

Knight Rider (1982 – 1986)

Back when the Hoff’s lucky number was number 5 (see the episode when he has knives thrown at him while he stood against a board)! This is TV greatness – great theme tune – spoiled in the last 10years by too many Hip Hop Artists ripping it off – but still a great theme tune. And probably one of the reasons we all love cars – we all wanted a car like KITT when we were younger! Or was it just me?

The Cosby Show (1984 – 1992)

Quite possibly for me my favourite American family - Bill Cosby aka: Doctor Huxtable became everyone’s new Dad when this show came on – Quality family entertainment!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987 - 1996)

Well Hero Turtles if you lived in the UK – As Ninja’s could be seen as violent according to the powers that be – crazy! Raphael was cool but crude and for me, my favourite Turtle – how hard was it to get the action figures back in 1987/1988?!?!

Neighbours (1985 – Present Day)

“No!” I hear you cry – but yes – this show has sadly kept me company since day one. Purely enjoyable and pure escapism when you’re supposed to be doing homework, university work and even present day work. Even the coldest heart can’t not love Harold Bishop!

ThunderCats (1985 – 1990)

THUNDER! THUNDER THUNDERCATS! HHHOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Without doubt this show was captivating when it first came out – who didn’t want to be Lion-O or Panthro! And I know the girls would try to be Cheetara. They don’t make kids TV like they used too!

OK – there are loads of good shows I missed out – but a Top Ten depends on your mood at the time of compilation. I could of included: Mask, The Muppets etc etc. However, I would love to hear what you think should have been included – just leave a message below!

Cheers me dears!

80's Memories hit me with the Son of Rambow (2008)

2008-10-03T04:30:00.010+01:00

Son of Rambow (2008)

“Come on Ma, It’s the 80’s!” Daniel San said it back then in the Karate Kid and I just found myself reliving a part of the 80’s!

I was born in 1980, so I’m fortunate enough to have taken in the joys of most of the 80’s from a childhood perspective. From my point of view during the 80’s; I never have my hair slicked back while I pranced around in red braces and embraced Thatcherism, I didn’t kiss the hot girl to any Wham, Flock of Seagulls or a Cure song when I lived in the 80’s (I have since then) – of course not – I was 9 years old when the 80’s ended.

My memories of the 80’s were from a child’s perspective and lucky for me I was blessed with a privileged up bringing. I went to good schools, I had the best friends in the world (at least from my perspective), and my teachers were scary but awe inspiring (Mr Pugh will always be the SAS Captain and we were his recruits). I spent days on end outside riding bikes, skateboards, BMX’s, setting up ramps and trying my best to jump higher than ever before without scraping my knees and chin. I swung from tree to tree in an effort to be like a monkey, I built tree houses and dens in the woods and bases in the ditches which to me were like Soldiers trenches. I played Cops & Robbers, Cowboys & Indians and all kinds of warfare games using sticks as props for guns, dock leaves would be our medic-kit if we rolled in Stinging Nettles and mud would be our war paint. If our imaginations came up with it we invented the scenario and played the make believe games from dusk till dawn.

Then when I came home for dinner and the sun had gone down maybe if I was lucky and it was a weekend I got to go to the video store with my Dad and choose an 80’s classic – be it The Goonies, Empire Strikes Back, Indiana Jones, Labyrinth, Ghost Busters, The Karate Kid and the list could go on for pages and pages. And then with sheer joy and excitement, like some kind of miracle a dodgy pirate copy of the 15 and 18 would find its way to me via a friend at school and just maybe if I could get the tracking right on the VCR I got to watch films like Top Gun (it was a 15!), Terminator, Robocop, Crocodile Dundee and even Rambo! Yes I wasn’t supposed to be seeing these 15 or 18 rated movies but these movies were the Holy Grail when you were growing up – if you didn’t know what ED-209 was you were out of the loop when playing Robocop in the playground but at the same time it was exactly these movies that added spices to our imaginations – we became the Terminator and we found ourselves down under wrestling crocodiles and at least for me and obviously many others out there you could no longer play in the woods anymore without thinking or at least pretending to be Rambo!

And like a stun grenade all these memories came flooding back to me tonight when I finally got to watch ‘Son of Rambow’ (2008). And what a film it is and yes thankfully it’s a British movie without cockneys or bumbling floppy haired chaps seeking romance!

Son of Rambow is written & directed by Garth Jennings (Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy 2005) inspired by the child hood home movies he used to make with his friends in his back garden. Set somewhere in middle England from June 1982 onwards (we know this because Rambo: First Blood was released in 1982 and the fish tank says June). Staring the very talented Bill Milner who plays the central character Will Proudfoot as well as the son of Rambow and the extraordinary Will Poulter who plays Lee Carter. The story plays out through the eyes of Proudfoot, the eldest sibling and only son of a fatherless Plymouth Brethren family who choose to live the strict and basic way of life while the those around them “outsiders” live out their lives in a typical British sense including Lee Carter – soon to be Proudfoot’s new best friend. Will Proudfoot has never been allowed to mix with the other 'outsiders' listen to music or watch TV, until he finds himself caught up in the extraordinary world of Lee Carter, the school cheeky chappy who is always up to mischief and maker of bizarre home movies. Carter exposes Proudfoot to a pirate copy of Rambo: First Blood and from that moment on, Will's mind is captivated by the legendary Stallone as Rambo which easily convinces him to be the stuntman in Lee Carters' ‘Screen Test’ home movie. Proudfoot’s imagination is not only given a chance to flourish in the world of film making, but also comes in very handy when it comes to dreaming up elaborate schemes to keep his partnership with Lee Carter a secret from the strict Brethren community.

As the story unfolds and we bare witness to hysterical fearless disregard for consequences as Proudfoot throws himself down hills and out of trees with complete innocent ambition and disregard for his health as they proceed in making there ‘Screen Test’ film in glorious rollercoaster form and thus eventually leading to true friendship as Blood Brothers. After an innocent with a flying dog they start to make a name for themselves at their school as movie makers, but when popularity descends on them in the form of the Pied Piper-esque French foreign-exchange student, Didier Revol (Jules Sitruk), their unique friendship and their precious film are pushed, quite literally, to breaking point.

I honestly can’t recommend this film enough – while its not perfect and there are a couple of niggling goofs that kind of annoyed me - 'Siouxsie And The Banshees' "Peek-A-Boo" is playing in the 6th form despite not being released until 1988 – First Blood came out in 1982! However, I’m a music geek and should really deal with this condition so if I ignore the odd out of place thing like that and amerce myself in this movie – which I did – Childhood memories engulf me and I’m left at the end of the movie feeling very emotional and touched.

9 / 10 - simply the best British movie I have seen in years!

Riflemind at the Trafalgar Theatre

2008-09-30T20:37:00.010+01:00

Here is my review of Riflemind - the review can be found at www.totallytheatre.com
However, just for you lucky people I post it here now, as it's been a week.

24 September 2008

by Alexander Van Terheyden

John Hannah (The Mummy Series and Sliding Doors), plays John, the former leader of iconic rock group Riflemind, who's organised a reunion of the band nearly twenty years after he walked off stage in Japan. The action is set over a weekend at John's country house somewhere in the rolling hills of northern England. Guests include ex- band members, the former manager, a possible new addition and an old groupie all hoping a legendary band is able to put the past behind them and reform.

We find John at odds with his brother Phil (Paul Hilton) as he relentlessly gives him abuse and the cold shoulder whilst struggling with himself and his abilities having not picked up a guitr in three years despite possessing legendary skills.

The bands Aussie manager Sam (Jeremy Sims) is desperately keen to get the band back together, you sense the inadequate in his life as he seeks emotional and physical support in the form of a "shag" from ex groupie, and now Phil's wife, Cindy (Ruth Gemmell - Fever Pitch). Friendship and banter come from fellow band mate and drummer Moon (Steve Rodgers) and whilst he may be the butt of some jokes and treated as just the drummer, he brings smiles and nostalgia to the proceedings. Questions are raised over his sexuality as he is accompanied by Lee (Joseph Kennedy), a young musician from Los Angeles who could be John's replacement or simply Moon's lover if all ends well.

The play feels a little like you're watching a reality TV show or better still your actually in the country house on the edge of the kitchen/living room thanks to the open set design. As action unfolds through anger, desire, disappointment, envy and resentment thrown together with memories of the good old days on tour, you become a voyeur of this strange weekend.

Hannah pulls off a convincing and solid performance however, his character is lacking and underwritten. Whilst he is believable to an extent, I had to feel school boy disappointment that a supposed Rock God would end with the tedious Lynn. I was honestly hoping she would have a break down, flip out and be gone by the time the Second Act came round, although we are left wondering that she might not be able to cope as the play draws to a close and her world might end.

Jeremy Sims delivers a great performance as the manager of the band, a character that you can imagine scuttling from gig to gig I personally think his character was written to be too likable.

To director Phillip Seymour Hoffman's credit he manages to direct a solid piece with the material he has had to work with - I just wish we could of seen him edit the scenes rather than feel the need to go with all of Upton's work.

It is clear writer Andrew Upton penned Riflemind like an album, and like any album you might find from an ageing middle of the road rock band. Some songs (scenes) are likable but most are forgettable and maybe a little too over indulgent. You are left with the impression that this album doesn't have more than one single on it and once you've played it through you're unlikely to want for more.

Not stated on the review on the website - but I gave the play 5/10

Below is the more uncut review... More controversial.... and of course unedited.

RIFLEMIND – a play by Andrew Upton – Directed by Philip Seymour Hoffman

Jim Morrison once said “I'm interested in anything about revolt, disorder, chaos, especially activity that appears to have no meaning. It seems to me to be the road toward freedom.” Maybe Andrew Upton had this quote in mind when he penned Riflemind – well possibly.

Riflemind is set over a weekend at John’s (John Hannah – The Mummy Series & Sliding Doors) country house somewhere in the rolling hills of northern England (we know this as its reachable via helicopter from London in 90mins). John is the leader of the band, the host for the reunion weekend and the reason the band split up in the first place. John lives with his wife Lynn (Susan Prior) and we look on as the guests arrive for the reunion weekend in the form of ex band members, manager, a possible new addition and an old groupie who makes up the entourage and with this in every guests mind they are hoping a legendary band is able to put the past behind them and reform.

Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, The Verve and even The Police, have all gone down this all too familiar route Riflemind are hoping of following example and you can understand why – whether it be for the money ( Blondie ), solo careers may of faltered ( Sting ), warring factions have buried the hatchet ( The Verve ), or simply for the old times sake of remembering what it feels to play to adoring fans ( Led Zeppelin – although it would be nice if Robert Plant was a little bit more keen on a more frequent basis! ).

John hasn’t had routine or much of a life since walking off stage back in 1991 while on tour in Japan – his days are now made up of arguing with his yoga obsessed alcoholic wife or talking about the finer points of tea and what effect that may have on the average human beings stomach. We find John at odds with his brother Phil (Paul Hilton) as he relentlessly gives him abuse and the cold shoulder while at the same time at struggling with himself and his abilities as he hasn’t picked up a guitar in three years despite being a “God” and one with the guitar before.

The bands Aussie manager Sam (Jeremy Sims) is desperately keen to get the band back together, you sense he feels inadequate in his life and seeks emotional and physical support in the form of a “shag” from ex groupie and now Phil’s wife Cindy (Ruth Gemmell – Fever Pitch). Friendship and old banter come from fellow band mate and drummer Moon (Steve Rodgers) while he may be the butt of some rib tickling and treated as just the drummer he brings the smiles to the pack and memories of old times while exuding a “is he gay or is he not gay” cloud of questioning on the proceedings as he arrives at the house with Lee (Joseph Kennedy) a young musician from Los Angeles who could be Johns replacement if John doesn’t step up to the plate or simply Moons lover if all ends well.

As their weekend unfolds we see: anger, desire, disappointment, envy, resentment thrown together with memories of the good old days on tour. And as you sit there watching it feels a little like you’re watching a reality TV show or better still your actually in the country house on the edge of the kitchen/living room thanks to the nice open set design complimenting the modern studio 1 at the Trafalgar Theatre, effectively you become a voyeur for the entirety of the weekend.

Hannah pulls off a solid performance convincingly believable as old Rock & Roll especially pleasing to see given his past roles tend to be less punk rock and more glam rock. However, the character is lacking – while he is believable to an extent I had to feel school boy disappointment that a supposed Rock God would end up shacked to the tedious Lynn – possibly the dullest and most irritating character of the play – she had the odd funny line but did I care for her? No – I was honestly hoping she would have a break down, flip out and be gone by the time the 2nd act came round – although we are left wondering that she might not be able to cope as the play draws to a close and her world might end.

Jeremy Sims delivers a gold performance as the manager of the band a character that you will see scuttling from gig to gig if you’re a fan of live music although I personally think his character was written to be too likable when in actual fact he should have been more of a scum bag like the Anti-Christ of Music Simon Cowell. I found myself disappointed that I didn’t see more from Ruth Gemmell and Steve Rodgers a lot less Lynn and more Moony & Cindy would have made for a far better performance.

To Phillip Seymour Hoffman’s (Best Actor Oscar winner for Capote) credit he manages to direct a solid piece with the material he has had to work with – I just wish we could of seen him edit the scenes rather than feel the need to go with all of Upton’s work. It is clear Upton penned Riflemind like an album and like any album you might find from any aging middle of the road rock band some songs (scenes) are likable but most are forgettable and maybe a little too over indulgent, leaving you under the impression that this album doesn’t have more than one single on it and once you’ve played the album through your unlikely to want to go back and revisit the work ever again.

2 and half stars - 5/10

By Alexander van Terheyden

Til next time.

Profile on Phillip Seymour Hoffman the Director of Riflemind

2008-09-27T15:59:00.007+01:00

Here is the article that was originally published on www.totallytheatre.com last week.

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17 September 2008

A profile of Philip Seymour Hoffman, Director of RifleMind at the Trafalgar Studios.

Alex van Terheyden profiles one of Hollywood's most gifted Actors, Philip Seymour Hoffman as he directs the European premiere of RIFLEMIND at the Trafalgar Studios.

In town to Direct RIFLEMIND starring John Hannah at the Trafalgar Studios, Philip Seymour Hoffman is possibly one of our generation's finest actors of recent years and yet thankfully he isn't the typical pretty boy that Hollywood is always so fond of. Hoffman if the first to admit that no one has ever commented favourably on his looks.

"A lot of people describe me as chubby, which seems so easy, so first-choice. Or stocky. Fair-skinned. Tow-headed. There are so many other choices. How about dense? I mean, I'm a thick kind of guy. But I'm never described in attractive ways. I'm waiting for somebody to say I'm at least cute. But nobody has."

I would feel sorry for him if he clearly wasn't as successful as he is and ignoring aesthetics (compared to most men - he is a striking chap) it's clearly unfair for any actor or individual to be up on the big screen with Tom Cruise (Mission Impossible 3 - 2006). Comparisons are always gong to be made if your up on screen with Mr Tom Cruise and his everyman looks are simply going to be overlooked!

We have to go back to the early 90's before Hoffman makes an impact on the big wide world. Back in 1992 he makes those of us watching sit up and pay attention as he plays the spoilt rich kid. The rich kid who tries his best to avoid being kicked out of prep school for a school prank by using Daddies connections but not before he gets dragged up in front of the school court where Chris O'Donnell also sweats it out before being rescued by Al Pacino's Lieutenant Colonel Frank Slade in his Oscar winning performance! I'd like to think that it was Hoffman's close proximity to the genius that is Al Pacino that may of inspired him to strive forward with his own career towards what would eventually award him every actors dream accolade; his own future Oscar from playing the part of Truman Capote in the 2005 film "Capote".

However, it would be hysterical to presume Philip Seymour Hoffman sailed into his acting career with relative ease, yet we can see by the choices he made that it was down to a lot of hard grafting and dedication. Born July 23, 1967 the BAFTA, Golden Globe, SAG and Academy Award-winning American actor who started life out in fairly humble surroundings in Up State New York, growing up with his brother & sister he soon came to map out the typical western family ideal when at the age of 9 his parents divorced. Facing this breakup; like any strong 9 year old he went on to study hard and just get on with it - he embraced sports to begin with, but when girls entered the fray he soon realised the only way to impress the girl was to get himself signed up for the Schools production of The Crucible a sound opportunity to meet a Senior he had a thing for while at High School. After this he pursued Drama with dedication throughout the rest of school and came to make the fine choice later of enrolling in New York University's Tisch School of the Arts where in 1989 he received a BFA in Drama.

Hoffman's hurdle came early in life when upon leaving NYU as an actor expected to exceed expectations he hit a wall and found himself in rehab before celebrity status had even touched him - during which he came to deal with his drug and alcohol addictions and has since remained sober since the age of 22.

Hoffman has been quoted as saying: "Other people disagree with me, but Scent of a Woman really was my breakthrough. I was working in the prepared foods section of a deli when I was cast in that movie, and I've never had a non-acting job since. That's amazing". Since 1992 nothing could be further from the truth - there has simply been no need for Hoffman to go back to working in Deli's or waiting on tables like many actors have to endure forever or at least for more years than they would care to remember. He has since established a successful and respected film career playing diverse and idiosyncratic characters in supporting roles, working with a wide variety of noted directors (almost the who's who of Hollywood), including Paul Thomas Anderson (sealing 4 out of 5 of Anderson's feature films with his strong unforgettable performance as Scotty J in the masterpiece that is "Boogie Nights"), The Coen Brothers, Cameron Crowe, Spike Lee, David Mamet, Robert Benton, Todd Solondz and the late Anthony Minghella.

For the first 10 years of Hoffman's significant career he had been famed for playing a manifold of compelling supporting roles each one iconic and leaving a lasting impression - could it be this talented actor had been overlooked for the leading role for this long? Well circumstances began to change when in 2002 Hoffman starred as a widower coping with his wife's suicide in Love Liza, for which his brother, Gordy Hoffman, wrote the screenplay. In 2003, he played the lead role in Owning Mahowny as a bank employee who embezzles money to feed his gambling addiction.

Although Hoffman didn't suddenly stop playing supporting parts once he landed his first few lead roles as he went on to deliver nothing but solid performances in such films as "Cold Mountain", as a carnally obsessed preacher, "Along Came Polly", as Ben Stiller's crude has-been actor buddy, and "Mission: Impossible III", as villainous arms dealer Owen Davian out to kill Ethan Hunt in what was probably the scariest villain of 2006 in my honest opinion. Hoffman has distinguished himself by playing a wide contrast of characters these have included outwardly gay characters (Boogie Nights, Flawless and Capote), desolate unfrequented losers (Happiness), spoilt rich brats (Scent of a Woman, Patch Adams and The Talented Mr. Ripley), caring and nurturing figures (Magnolia and Almost Famous), vicious sadistic thugs (Punch-Drunk Love and Mission: Impossible III), sensitive artists (State and Main), an outlandish CIA officer (Charlie Wilson's War), and so on.

2005 was undoubtedly Hoffman's year; he won global acclaim for his portrayal of writer Truman Capote in the film "Capote". In addition to his Academy Award for Best Actor he won no less than a total of 22 other global awards for his phenomenal performance for a character that simply can't be taken on by any average actor. And when asked about acting and his responsibility as an actor: "Actors are responsible to the people we play. I don't label or judge. I just play them as honestly and expressively and creatively as I can, in the hope that people who ordinarily turn their heads in disgust instead think, 'What I thought I'd feel about that guy, I don't totally feel right now"

It seems Hoffman hasn't been hit with the Louise Rainer & Halle Berry curse of winning an Oscar because he has turned in nothing but solid performances since then most notably when he was nominated for the Golden Globe for Best Actor in a Supporting Role for playing Gust Avrakotos, a CIA officer who helps Congressman Charlie Wilson support a covert war in Afghanistan in the movie "Charlie Wilson's War". In 2008, he was also nominated for the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor for the same role.

The UK and London in particular right now is being blessed with Hoffman's presence for a short time only as he is the Director of the upcoming play "RIFLEMIND" at the Trafalgar Theatre - except this isn't Hoffman's first stab at the world of theatre - not by a long shot if you excuse the pun.

Phillip Seymour Hoffman has twice been nominated for a Tony Award: as Best Actor (Play) in 2000 for a Broadway revival of Sam Shepard's "True West" opposite John C. Reilly, and for Best Actor (Featured Role - Play) in 2003 for a revival of Eugene O'Neill's Long Day's Journey into Night. In 1999, he also starred in Richard Greenberg's one-act play, The Author's Voice, in New York. When asked about Theatre in the past Hoffman has been quoted as saying: "The stage can be more satisfying because you spend a lot of time rehearsing, and film is more technical. In the end it just depends on the work and the director. I do like the world of the theatre though." A little vague but at the same time forever thought provoking.

Hoffman not only has distinguished himself as a fine actor on and off Broadway but has also shined as a director previously with off-Broadway projects such as Rebecca Gilman's The Glory of Living, and Stephen Adly Guirgis's Jesus Hopped the A Train, The Last Days of Judas Iscariot, and The Little Flower of East Orange. And to top it all Hoffman is co-artistic director of New York City's LAByrinth Theater Company, along with actor John Ortiz.

Hoffman is a major figure in the New York theatre world which is why it is a delight to have this opportunity to see his vision in London at the European premiere of RIFLEMIND, a new play by Sydney Theatre Company Co Artistic Director Andrew Upton. RIFLEMIND originally premiered in the land of the Boomerang where they seem to play cricket very well at the Sydney Theatre Company in 2007, directed by Hoffman. London's West End season features original Australian cast members Susan Prior, Steve Rodgers and Jeremy Sims alongside new faces in the form of talent from John Hannah, Paul Hilton and Ruth Gemmell.

RIFLEMIND is a play set twenty years after their front-man, John, walked off stage for good, the iconic rock band RIFLEMIND are set to get together again. For John (John Hannah), a reunion might be his second chance; for his wife Lynn (Susan Prior), is her world about to change? As the band descends upon John's country manor, one weekend fast becomes the ultimate test of talent, friendship and loyalty.

RIFLEMIND will launch a new phase of international collaboration for Trafalgar Studios as a unique producing house in the West End. Sydney Theatre Company, whose joint Artistic Directors are playwright Andrew Upton and his wife, actress Cate Blanchett, will join Trafalgar as an Associate Company of the venue. As an Associate Company, STC and Trafalgar will jointly develop new work, forming an international creative bridge in both directions.

RIFLEMIND will open at the Trafalgar Studios in London's West End on Thursday 18 September, following previews from 15 September. Performance times for "RIFLEMIND" at the Trafalgar Studios will be Mondays to Saturdays at 7.30pm with Thursday and Saturday matinees at 2.30pm.

New Website Launches - www.Totallytheatre.com

2008-09-26T19:26:00.006+01:00

Just thought I'd let you know that a new website has launched called Totally Theatre.
It covers all Theatre all over the UK (not just London).
Members only site predominantly - members get all access to Theatre ticket deals, Reviews and Interviews (the odd one here and there has been written by me).

Worth checking it out.

www.totallytheatre.com

Enjoy

Tropic Thunder (2008) - Ben Stiller

2008-09-23T04:43:00.008+01:00

Written, Directed and starred in by the now legendary Ben Stiller – Tropic Thunder comes at us guns blazing with full on comic timing.

I’m always pleased when a Hollywood picture stampedes into Multiplexes surrounded by controversy – it dictates Tinsel-town isn’t the weak pathetic fool it is often labelled to be by mainstream media outlets. The controversy comes at us with the words “Retard” (shock) and a white man undergoing a skin pigmentation operation enabling him to play 1970’s stereotyped ‘Black Man’! More of this later…

The first 10minutes of the movie I found myself in stitches, from the word go we’re introduced to the fictitious Hollywood stars through fake cinematic trailers introducing the movies they’ve just partaken in or in the case of Hip Hop Artist Alpa Chino (Brandon T. Jackson) a commercial promoting his ‘Booty Sweat’ drink. Tugg Speedman (Ben Stiller) while not as memorable or destined to be as iconic as Eric Zoolander still is hysterical – we see him playing action hero in 'Scorcher VI: Global Meltdown' a character and a movie so repetitive in its story you wonder if the commentator has a belief in it any more! We learn later on in the satire that is Tropic Thunder, that this washed out action hero has recently produced a flop in which he played the "Retard" title character in the flop, 'Simple Jack', apparently considered one of the worst films of all time according to ‘Access Hollywood’! Australian “five time Oscar winner” Kirk Lazarus (Robert Downey Jnr.) offers an explanation on why Tugg Speedman’s performance didn’t go down as well as Rainman or Forest Gump later on by stating he was just “too retarded”! (This deserves later analysis). Lazarus (obviously a complete send up on Russell Crowe) is depicted as the better actor to Speedman – his last film looks to be a hilarious Augustine Monk send up set in medieval ages to a Broke Back Mountain / Wonder Boys affair with “Co-winner of the MTV Best Kiss Award 2002” Tobey Maguire (as himself) as two monks who begin an impassioned affair under their robes! Lazarus probably the most ridiculous and yet funny of all those miss-cast in Tropic Thunder, has had his skin surgically dyed black in order to play Afro-American sergeant Lincoln Osiris, so passionate and devoted to the act of playing his character he refuses to drop out of character “until I have completed the DVD commentary” – a true method actor! And then there’s funny-man Jeff "Fatty" Portnoy (Jack Black), playing the entirety of "America's favourite obese family" in the highly flatulent 'The Fatties: Fart 2' (a send up on the Nutty Professor series) – who we later learn is a heroin-addict off-screen.

We finally join Tropic Thunder in all out war, ripping off very nicely, scenes from Apocalypse Now, Platoon, A Thin Red Line and Predator to name a few as the soldiers fight for their lives in pure ridiculous style. One moment everyone’s fighting, hanging from helicopters, pushing their intestines back into their body ‘Sandusky’ (Jay Baruchel) and hands are seen blown-off but all is ruined when Speedman is unable to cry and Lazarus dribbles uncontrollably into Speedman's face forcing Speedman to yell “Cut!” – Much to the dismay of British Director – Damien Cockburn (Steve Coogan). Especially frustrating to Cockburn knowing that the Fighter Jets are only minutes away and if they can’t get this scene right now, it’s going to cost time and money – something that is further exacerbated when the film's pyrotechnics expert, Cody (Danny R. McBride), mistakes Cockburn's conniptions for a go to set off $4million worth of pyrotechnic explosions at the wrong time!

If war is Hell, then what this send up on Hollywood actors and war movies tells us; working with self obsessed Hollywood TIVO demanding Pre Madonna’s is Hell at its worst! Cockburn is soon fronted with the situation that his Studio boss Les Grossman (Tom Cruise) will potentially shut down his movie if he can’t get his actors into line and shoot the film on time and on budget. Faced with this daunting scenario Cockburn takes on the advice from the writer of Tropic Thunder ‘real-life Vietnam veteran’ John 'Four Leaf' Tayback (Played by the superb Nick Nolte) to shoot the rest of the film ‘guerilla-style’, with hidden cameras and microphones. The only snag, the actors are dropped in a dangerous part of South East Asia that happens to be run by a drug cartel and thus quickly fall foul of a heavily armed gang of Oriental drug-runners led by a machinegun- toting child soldier. The adventure ensues and chaos runs rife in pure visual glory with performances that have wonderful comedy timing and in your face laughs.

OK – Tropic Thunder may be controversial to the PC Brigade – but does this make it a bad movie? Apparently those with special needs insisted the word “retard” be taken out of this movie and insisted Stiller’s character shouldn’t be playing a retard in a comedy film but fortunately this was all left in and honestly you can see why they didn’t bow to the PC wingers’. According to co-writer Etan Cohen, the scenes were not meant to derive humour from mental disability itself, but to satirize emotionally exploitative depictions of mental disability in movies such as Forrest Gump (1994) and Rain Man (1988), and the actors who take these roles. And in my opinion they succeeded in doing this – very well in fact!

The other controversial point of this movie is the character ‘Lazarus’ who is a white man from Australia who has undergone a skin pigmentation operation to really get into character but in doing so probably makes himself look even more ridiculous. Robert Downy Jnr. Was originally very reluctant to take the role because he felt wearing the make-up to look African-American was offensive. But Downey later accepted the role because he liked the script and wanted to work with Stiller and Jack Black and if he accept himself in the role I personally believe the way this satires itself makes it more than acceptable especially given that Lazarus comes off looking ridiculous rather than offending anyone else.

Of note is Matthew McConaughey for once – a strong and fun performance in a role which could of easily had been meant for Owen Wilson but McConaughey nicely makes his own role as Tugg’s over-supportive agent - Ari Gold minus the expletives? However, by far the strongest performance doesn’t come from any of the army men but instead from Tom Cruise, as abusive studio boss Len Grossman who many Hollywood insiders will compare to Harvey Weinstein. Buried under a liver-spotted bald-patch, beard and glasses, Cruise cuts loose Magnolia-style as he screams insults at his underlings “Cockburn, from now on my fist is going to be so far up your shithole that every time you have a thought, it's gonna have to tiptoe past my wedding ring!” My hope is this role brings Cruise back from the Hollywood void he has recently inhabited having destroyed his reputation having hung out too frequently with the Beckham's and declaring all out love on Oprah. Cruise honestly can pull off comedy with pure precision and excellence (as seen previously in Magnolia far to long ago) and he is a good enough reason to see this movie alone – the only disappointment – we don’t see him completely satirise his dancing with his brilliant comedy rap-dancing by jumping on a sofa, I really wish he had – but at the same time pure genius Tom!

It would be nice if this film was as funny throughout as it is in the first 10mins but it isn’t and it does have its ups and downs and there is the odd groan here and there but there are more laughs in this 107mins than the entire existence of ITV. All in all it’s not Zoolander – but definitely the finest Hollywood satire you will see this year and probably next year.

A deserved 4 stars aka 8 out of 10!

Oh dear it’s Old Labour at the Labour party conference!

2008-09-21T05:14:00.007+01:00

Like me you are probably sick of the state of this country. If its not rising crime, rising unemployment, rising prices well above the already high 4.9% official inflation stated, rising taxes, the awareness that our pollution per head is higher than ever before and now we’re officially more crowded per square km than the Netherlands because of rising Immigration (most of which is illegal)! You would think it strange that New Labour would bother to have a conference right now like they do every year – can they really attempt to con the public once again and stress things are great?

What are they going to tell us? Well they’re certainly not going to be honest enough to admit that they’ve fucked up this country and sent it down the murky toilet more so than what it was 11+ years ago. Good God no! They would never admit to that! Will they admit that the Tax burden is greater than ever before and yet we get less for our money than ever before because the infrastructure of this country is so overstretched due to overcrowding and the anti-social behaviour that is out of control is eating away at any spare cash available? Of course Gordon Brown will never admit to this.

What we are going to see over the remaining days of this conference is a rather scared but smug Brown who is glad he is in the History books for being the Prime minister but scared out of his mind because his ego trip is coming to an end – very quickly! He knows that New Labour are going to lose the next election when he finally gets round to calling one and he also knows there is a high chance his fellow colleagues at New Labour are going to push for his head – finally knocking that smug grin off his face once and for all.

Those that know me well, will know its no secret that the only man on this planet I hate is Mr Gordon Brown – it is because of him I came out of University with over £20,000+ in debt! He promised in the mid 90’s as the shadow chancellor and then again as the Chancellor back in 1997 that he would not introduce Tuition fees or abolish the Grant and then low and behold this lying twat introduced Tuition fees and abolished the Grant in his first ever Budget! “University for all” he said well I’d like to know how this can happen when the minimum yearly fee is now over £3k and you must find this money every year before you’ve paid for accommodation, books, travel and all the extra’s needed to be a student! And then if you want to do a Masters - £24k if you fancy going to the London Business School and that’s just 1 years worth of tuition. Is it any wonder why you don’t see Students Protesting anymore – it’s because they’re all too busy working 3 jobs just for the privilege of attending a University Mr Gordon Brown and his useless disciples attended for free while receiving a grant to pay for needed extras like books years before they were elected!

How many times over the last 11 years have I heard – “oh but Gordon Brown was a wonderful Chancellor!” – Bullshit! This smug useless individual inherited an economy rallying forward – ask anyone who knows anything about Economics and they will tell you what you do in the years before with the economy takes time to feed through. Well Brown's increasing taxation and so called prudent spending has literally fed through to strangling this economy. Yes we are feeling the effects of the Credit Crunch but would this had happened if New Labour hadn’t of sucked up to the City & Wall Street enabling them to be reckless with their lending? But we aren’t just feeling the effects of the Credit Crunch we are feeling the effects of droves of businesses collapsing or leaving this country because they’ve been overtaxed and penalised for being entrepreneurial. Nice one Gordon!

Well I have my fingers crossed that this week isn’t the saving of Gordon Brown but instead we see his colleagues stab him the back and show him up for the useless leader and politician he really is!

If you’re not sure how useless he is – observe this clip from YouTube:

Til next time

The Bank Job (2008) - Long overdue words about this Brit Flick

2008-09-10T18:32:00.011+01:00

The Bank Job(2008)

Geezer – It’s another Cockney Movie with “Crims”! Since Guy Richie came to be such an influence in old Blighty we have had a fair few flicks set in the London’s East End. Or at least there seems to be a lot more Cockneys up on our screens these days claiming to drink in the Blind Beggar running around, either getting into trouble or escaping trouble. So when I saw the trailer to The Bank Job sometime last year I have to admit I wasn’t overly giddy with excitement. – was this going to be another cock up?

Based on the True Story of the Lloyds Bank Baker Street Heist in 1971 - screenwriting duo Dick Clement & Ian La Frenais have done a superb job of bringing characterisation and back stories into one final Script that any actor would have been pleased to have worked on. And rightly so the majority of the actors embrace the script and pull out some strong performances – Jason Statham once again pulling off a slicker British version of Bruce Willis but made modern for the next generation. The eye candy comes in the form of Saffron Burrows – she plays the girl made good from London’s Bethnal Green who makes it big in the world of modelling – but like Kate Moss has a fondness for drugs – so on her way back into Heathrow she gets busted for being in possession of a haul of drugs. Pulling some strings she gets an old love interest to set up a deal, enabling her the opportunity to escape prison except theirs a catch she has to agree to find some scoundrels to steal something for Mi6 because they can’t be connected to the heist. For her Majesties sake of course!

This being a true story and those of you being alive in the 1971 and conscious (Jim Morrison had already passed for he left us in July 1971) – this is set in September 1971. Hence, I don’t think I’m giving too much away if I let you know the Bank Job goes ahead and all members of the Statham’s gang are utilised in their happy go lucky ways – the well spoken Old Englishman does his job to cover the shop front while they dig a tunnel from shop to bank, the young naïve kid covers the Bank by staking out the bank – each one is a character – some stronger than others – but amazingly all characters are very likable – rare in modern British movies – I mean did you care for anyone in St Trinian’s?

As the job gets done and the panic hits the relevant institutions each group is slowly brought together – a classic connect the dots situation ensures as the film proceeds. We learn why a Trinidadian Gangster has anything to do with the story and why the Porn King of Soho has any connection with a bank job that goes down on London’s Baker Street. Pure escapism, with a Discovery channel educational look and feel to it. 7/10

Bob Dylan is no where to be seen - but does it matter?

2008-08-11T00:27:00.007+01:00

I'm not there (2007) – Directed by Todd Haynes

There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman; some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me: only an entity, something illusory. And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable... I simply am not there.

Ignoring the word simply, the last time I heard “I’m not there” was from the amazing film American Psycho – so the first thing that sprang to mind when I first heard of this title were these words uttered by Patrick Bateman. But alas this is something far different.

“I’m Not There” the Biopic of the forever changing man Bob Dylan comes to us from Todd Haynes – already familiar with the music genre having delivered the highly original Velvet Goldmine back in 1998. The title stems from a previously unreleased Dylan recording of the title song "I'm Not There", which was recorded during the "The Basement Tapes" sessions. Haynes has set out on a Dylan Journey capturing the truth in the lies, grandeur, childishness and arrogance that made Dylan as notorious as he was and ever will be. Some have called him genius and if you’re a fan of any of his work you will marvel at his rhymes and playfulness with harmonica and guitar. Haynes transports you into Dylan’s mind as well from a side line through the eyes of many of the people that came across him over the years, by bringing us six incarnations of Bob Dylan: an actor, a folk singer, an electrified troubadour, Rimbaud, Billy the Kid, and Woody Guthrie. On top of this Todd Haynes with pure mixing skill and musical greatness that could probably only be emulated by Bob himself puts Dylan's music behind their adventures, soliloquies, interviews, marriage, and infidelity.

Before seeing this cinematic work – I had heard rumours that some of the cast were strong while others put in a weak performance. Well I’m not usually a fan of Richard Gere – his movies such as "Shall we Dance" should never had been made and I had heard a lot of bad press in regards to his performance but I think this simply may be down to people not really getting the reasoning behind him as Billy the Kid. Without ruining it for you Gere is a version of the elderly Dylan with the other stories being in the past of this story. This story focuses on Dylan's country life of the Woodstock era and his later years. A very solid performance from Gere - don't believe the haters.

It has been said before but I will say it again: Cate Blanchett turns in the strongest and most recognizable performance of Dylan playing the character Jude Quinn, a version of Dylan who was at the height of his fame in the 60’s as he toured with the Beatles in London when his original fan base was rejecting him as a sell out – truly mesmerising and dream like sequences reminiscent of many 60’s art films of the era and interviews given by Dylan.

Christian Bale (Jack Rollins) focusing on Dylan’s early folk era and then later finding Christianity is as you would expect nothing but solid – will Bale ever do a bad movie? Reign of Fire isn’t a bad movie! The late Heath Ledger turns in phenomenal performance in the form of the fictional Robbie Clark who focuses on Dylan’s personal life and his brief appetite into the world of acting as he plays Bale’s fictional character Jack Rollins in the film “Grain of Sand” referenced to 1981’s haunting Gospel song.

The most enjoyable performance to watch musically probably comes from the very young and talented African American actor Marcus Carl Franklin (a name to watch I personally believe) – he is the traveling Dylan reminiscing about the past always on the run with the other hobo’s while singing the Blues while giving youth and crossing borders to who Dylan is and was and wanted to be.

And last but by no means least a solid performance is put in by Ben Whishaw who is forever being questioned by what could be the CIA, FBI or just simply the establishment – spouting vague poetic meaning to his questions that some could interpret as meaningless but others will interpret to mean a thousand things that only Dylan could of come up with.

If you’re easily confused and simple in the head and possibly not a fan of Bob Dylan or you have no appreciation for any of the above actors mentioned then maybe yes you won’t enjoy this Biopic of a mysterious musician who was many things. But if you approach this with intrigue and the desire to escape into Todd Haynes world of Bob Dylan then you will find a highly rewarding 135mins that will urge you once again to dig out your old Dylan records for another play.

9/10 – Well Done Todd Haynes

Youtube link for the Movie Trailer:

Alexander van Terheyden

The War on Democracy - what right does America have to dictate?

2008-08-07T01:56:00.005+01:00

The War on Democracy - Written & Directed by John Pilger

The award winning and much honoured Journalist and documentary film maker originally from Sydney who these days predominately bases himself in London once said:
“More terrorists are given training and sanctuary in the United States than anywhere on earth. They include mass murderers, torturers, former and future tyrants and assorted international criminals. This is virtually unknown to the American public, thanks to the freest media on earth.”

The War on Democracy is John Pilger's first cinematic released documentary despite making documentaries over many decades. Set in Latin America and the US, it explores the historic and current relationship of Washington with countries such as Venezuela, Bolivia and Chile as well as the countless others the US has implemented foreign policy on. As the documentary proceeds John examines the role of Washington in America’s manipulation of Latin American policies during the last 50 years leading to the struggle of ordinary people to free themselves from poverty and racism. The film illustrates how since the mid 19th Century Latin America has been the US’s money pit and playground with its Milton Friedman Economic games. And yet recently with the rise up of a democratically elected Hugo Chavez and Washington’s best backed efforts to unseat him with coup’s and propaganda Chavez remains the man of the people to Venezuela’s forgotten – proven by a solid 80%+ turnout in support of Chavez in over 6 elections (something a western government could only dream of).

When I traveled through Nicaragua last year I discovered first hand through talking to the shop keepers, academics and locals how America had poured money into the Contra Forces hoping the rebels would force out the Revolutionary Sandinista Junta of National Reconstruction following the July 1979 overthrow of Anastasio Somoza Debayle (a dictator supported by the Washington at the time). Eventually the US got its way again through propaganda forcing out the Sandinistra Junta but at a huge cost to Nicaragua through life and liberties – “how dare it rebel against the mighty US of A! It will pay for this economically” – fortunately it hasn’t been repressed in the same league Cuba has suffered at the fist of the good old US.

I personally believe every American needs to watch this documentary only to highlight what their so called freedom’s entail for the rest of the world that doesn’t fall into line and drink Coca Cola and have a so called democracy that is pro-American business. As you will learn, effectively that’s what it’s really all about – managing other economies so the rich can get richer and the elite can stay in power and those that get in the way get crushed. A special mention has to go to the angry CIA man (Duane), who warns that if countries don't follow Washington's wishes economically and politically, their governments/people will face further coups, torture, poverty and economic sabotage. Although I have always suspected this to be the case and that it will continue to carry on, it's still refreshing/chilling to actually hear it from the pigs’ mouth.

9/10 – well deserved of the 2008 One World Award.